Carry You Home
by bohemiangirl
Summary: Set after 'Aliyah.' With Ziva held captive in Somalia, NCIS is informed of attacks planed on Navy targets in Africa and a team is deployed. See how the team including Abby is affected by Ziva's absense and how Ziva is changed forever by her experiences.
1. Trouble is Her Only Friend

_Author's Note: This is my first NCIS fic. I usually write for Grey's Anatomy and have also written for Private Practice, but I am an NCIS obsessive climbing the walls after the finale so I've decided to make the transition into NCIS fic. Please review for me. It'd be much appreciated. I hope that you like it. _

**CARRY YOU HOME**

**Chapter 1 – Trouble is Her Only Friend **

_Ziva woke up, not immediately knowing which room they had taken her to this time, whether it was day or night or how long she had been captured for. The only thing that she did know was that she was still there and that even the Mossad, arguably the most efficient intelligence agency in the world, had been unable to find her… if they had even been looking for her in the first place. Ziva lifted her head and that small movement seemed to send sharp, piercing pains through every part of her body, causing her to cry out despite her best efforts to stay silent and stoic. She opened her eyes as wide as she could but could barely see anything due to the facial swelling caused from repeated beatings. Across the hard cement floor, Ziva heard the heavy footsteps of her captors and their hushed voices speaking in Arabic, but before she could make out what they were saying, a sudden blow to her head knocked her back into unconsciousness. _

"What've you got for me, Abs?" Gibbs asked nonchalantly as he exited the elevator and went into Abby's lab, expecting the same frosty reception that he had received from her since his return from Israel minus a member of their family, one week earlier. He was right. Abby gave him an angry glare and ignored the Caf-Pow that he placed on the bench beside her before informing Gibbs of the DNA evidence found from their latest crime scene. Abby avoided eye contact with Gibbs the whole time.

"That's good work, Abby," Gibbs said after she had finished, satisfied with the conclusions that she had reached in such a short space of time. Abby nodded vaguely, clicking away at the computer screen in front of her. Usually Gibbs had to be the one to end their lengthy conversations but lately he hadn't been able to get a single word out of Abby that didn't relate to a case directly at hand.

Gibbs started to leave but stopped himself just before he reached the elevator.

"Look, Abs," he started to say, turning back around. But by the time that he had turned back around, Abby had sealed herself behind her glass door and appeared to be busy at work on another computer, taking no notice of him. Her Caf-Pow remained untouched on the counter. Gibbs looked back around Abby's lab and noticed that she had positioned two mops against a bench where the agents often stood when consulting her. A picture of Tony and a picture of Ziva were stuck to each mop, something that Abby had done before when the team had been split up. Gibbs sighed to himself, replaying his conversation with Ziva on that tarmac in Israel over in his head once again before forcing himself to think back to the present.

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"I'm taking a break," Gibbs announced to McGee and the two temporary agents who were occupying Tony and Ziva's desks. The agents looked surprised as Gibbs went to the elevator and exited the building.

"Gibbs doesn't take breaks," Agent Johnson, the youngest of the two temporary agents said to McGee, nervously.

"He must have a good reason, Probie," McGee replied. McGee always thought that he would enjoy the day when he got to call someone 'Probie' but all it did was remind him of how quickly things had changed. "Keep chasing up on those leads," he told the two temporary members of his team before getting into the elevator himself and heading down to Abby's lab.

"What was that for?" McGee asked Abby when he was met with a glare as the elevator doors opened.

"Sorry," Abby said from where she was running fingerprints through the AFIS database. "I thought you were Gibbs again." McGee sighed.

"Abby," he said. "I know you're upset but this isn't all Gibbs' fault. I miss Ziva too but she had the choice to board the plane back to D.C and she chose to stay in Tel Aviv." Abby shook her head defiantly.

"He left her behind," she said. "I really didn't think he'd let this happen again, McGee." McGee sighed again, knowing that there would be no reasoning with Abby. "And I know I'm fast," Abby continued. "But I'm not that fast. I don't have a match for you guys yet."

"It's okay," McGee replied. "I came down here to take you to lunch. You've been working non stop lately. Come on, you need a break." McGee gently put his hand on top of Abby's, which was clicking away at the mouse, until it was resting and she agreed to stop working.

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"Dinozzo," Gibbs said sternly, addressing Tony's voicemail, the only means of contact that he had had with him since the day they had returned to D.C. That night, Director Vance had ordered Tony to take a week's leave to recover from his injury and the events which had culminated in their visit to Israel. "I don't care whether you're in the building or not, you still work for me and you will answer your damn phone when I call you!" When Tony still didn't pick up, Gibbs slammed his cell phone shut and went into Tony's apartment building.

"Dinozzo!" Gibbs shouted, knocking on the door repeatedly, after Tony didn't answer. Finally he heard footsteps dragging across the floor inside and the door opened. Gibbs had expected Tony to be less than his jovial self but he was shocked when he saw him. Wearing a singlet and jeans which looked like they hadn't been washed in weeks, unshaven and bleary eyed, Tony looked anything but the sharp, image-conscious Agent Dinozzo who commanded attention at NCIS.

"Oh hey, boss," he slurred.

"You're drunk," Gibbs said, disapprovingly.

"I'm not working," Tony replied, letting Gibbs into his apartment.

"It's not even 11am, Dinozzo," Gibbs said as his eyes travelled around the apartment, looking at the mass of fast food containers and dirty laundry which littered the floor. He started Tony down as he sat on the couch and waited for an explanation, to which Tony simply topped up his scotch glass. Before Gibbs could open his mouth to try and snap Tony out of the mood that he seemed to have descended into, his cell phone began ringing.

"Yeah, Gibbs," he said, thinking that it had better be important.

"Special Agent Gibbs," said a familiar voice.

"Director," Gibbs replied coolly.

"We have a situation," Vance said officially. "I need you back at NCIS now. "It's a matter of national security." The line went dead and Gibbs closed his cell phone.

"Get up," he said to Tony who was slumped on the couch, drinking. "You're back on duty now." Tony shook his head, reading the time on his watch.

"I still have 22 hours," he slurred in response. "Or is that 20? I can't see if that's a two or a-"

"Dinozzo!" Gibbs snapped, cutting him off. "Get up, get a clean shirt on and get in the God damn car."

"Yes, boss," Tony replied, admitting defeat.

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Fifteen minutes later, after excluding the two temporary members of the team from their meeting, Gibbs and Tony entered Director Leon Vance's office where McGee was already waiting for them.

"Tony?" McGee said, as surprised by Tony's shabby appearance as he was to see him. Tony merely nodded in response, not sober enough to respond with one of his trademark witty comments.

"Special Agent Gibbs, Special Agent Dinozzo," Vance said, greeting them and trying to ignore Tony's drastic change in appearance. "I've just received intelligence from a sister agency which indicates that there is a terror attack planned on American naval interests at several African ports. It's estimated that up to 3000 Marines could be in the line of fire. The agency that we have been liaising with believes that this particular cell is operating out of Somalia. They have officers in the zone but…" his voice trailed off.

"But?" Gibbs prompted him.

"Their team has officers in the area but they have experienced mass causalities and some officers have been captured."

"What agency?" Tony asked, speaking to Vance for the first time. Vance looked uncomfortable for a moment, all too aware of the mess that Tony had recently found himself in. "What agency?" Tony asked again, louder and more urgent this time.

"Mossad," Vance replied. Tony felt his blood run cold. Gibbs' jaw clenched tightly.

"This terror cell," Gibbs started. "It's the cell that Rivkin was working on taking out, isn't it?" Vance nodded.

"And Ziva?" Gibbs asked.

"I have been informed that Officer David is missing, alongside several other Mossad officers involved in the mission," Vance answered.

"Jesus Christ," Tony said to himself, under his breath, his heart pounding.

"We're sending a team, led by you, Gibbs, to the targeted regions to secure American interests and prevent any attacks on our Marines," Vance explained. Special Agent Gibbs, Special Agent Dinozzo, pack your bags. Special Agent McGee, you will be in charge of communications for this mission."

_The familiar pains shooting through every part of her body let Ziva know that she was awake once more. 'Why shouldn't I give them what they want?' she thought to herself. It wasn't as though she had the kind of classified information that they really wanted. But she knew why she had stayed silent. As soon as she told them all that she knew, as soon as they were done with her, she would be dead. Ziva had once said that she would never be taken alive but some sense of self-preservation had kicked in upon her capture and had prevented her from giving them what they wanted so that she could stay alive. _

"_Hashim," Ziva heard one of her captors say to another. He continued to speak in Arabic. "We are done with him." Ziva was still unable to see through her swollen eyes but she knew that the man was referring to Aharon, a fellow Mossad officer, who had also been captured and brought into the room with Ziva days, or was it weeks?, earlier. The man named Hashim responded swiftly by firing his gun into Aharon, ending his life._

"_I'll make the woman talk," Their other captor said. "Just give me a little alone time with her."_

Thoughts?


	2. She Says its High Time She Went Away

Author's note: Thank you so, so much to the people who reviewed the first chapter for me. That chapter was me testing the waters because I'd never written NCIS fic before, although I adore the show, so your reviews have given me a bit more confidence than I had before. Here's the next chapter. I hope that you like it. Please let me know what you think.

**CHAPTER 2 – She Says it's High Time She Went Away **

_Ziva didn't even try to open her eyes this time. She didn't want to see anything. In fact, she willed herself to pass out once again just so that she could escape. What else could possibly be taken from her? For the first time since her capture she was giving serious contemplation to giving up and telling them whatever she thought they wanted to hear so that they would kill her like they'd killed Aharon and be done with it. Even if she did somehow get out, what did she have to go back to? Comrades who couldn't, or wouldn't save her? A father who put his agency before his daughter? NCIS? Gibbs had left her standing on a tarmac in Israel. The thought that he didn't fight for her, that he had let her go so easily on top of everything else that she was going through at that time brought tears to her eyes. _

"God, Tony, when was the last time you showered?" McGee asked as he, Tony and Gibbs stood in the elevator which was headed to Abby's lab.

"Too long ago," Gibbs muttered as Tony's stench filled the elevator. As the elevator stopped, but before the doors opened, Tony stepped forward and walked straight into the doors.

"Ow! Oh God," he said angrily to himself as the doors opened. Gibbs smacked him on the back of the head as he stepped out of the elevator.

"He's drunk," McGee whispered to Gibbs.

"You think, McGee?" Gibbs asked irritably.

"What was that noise?" Abby asked, concerned walking over to them as they entered the lab.

"What noise?" McGee asked.

"That 'thunking' noise," Abby said. Her eyes wandered past Gibbs and McGee to where Tony was walking slowly to catch up. "Tony!" Abby shouted, rushing over to him and throwing her arms around him. "You're back!" After about a second of hugging him she suddenly let go. "Oh my God, you smell like… like scotch and fried chicken and…" she dived at Tony again, hugging him tightly. "You know, it doesn't matter 'cos you're back. I missed you!"

"I missed you too, Abs," Tony replied. "Abby?"

"Yeah?" Abby replied, continuing to hug him.

"Cant breathe."

"Sorry!" Abby said, stepping back. "Oh my God, you're bleeding!" she said, grabbing some tissues from one of her work benches and pressing them to Tony's nose. "What happened?"

"Oh, _that_ 'thunking' noise," McGee said.

"Abby," Gibbs spoke up. "We're going to Somalia."

"What?" Abby said, shocked. "Why?"

"Terrorists want to attack our marines," McGee said.

"So send more marines," Abby replied. "Why do you guys have to go?"

"Because hopefully we can stop them attacking our guys to begin with," Gibbs said. "McGee is going to be running our communications while we're there. I want you on his team." Abby nodded, nervously, turning to her computer and opening a new program. "It'll be okay, Abs," Gibbs said, reassuringly.

"I don't believe it when you say that anymore," Abby said sadly, looking at her computer instead of at Gibbs. Gibbs sighed, not knowing what to say to her. He turned back to Tony and McGee. "McGee, take Dinozzo home and make sure he doesn't give himself another injury while packing his stuff. Then put your team together."

"Yes, Boss," McGee answered as he and Tony left Abby's lab leaving Abby and Gibbs standing there in silence.

"You can't stay mad at me forever, Abby," Gibbs said. "Abby ignored him defiantly. "We're leaving in a few hours. I was going to come down here and say goodbye but if you don't want me to…" his voice trailed off as Abby continued to ignore him. Gibbs nodded, taking the hint, and started to walk away.

"Wait… Gibbs," Abby said. Gibbs turned around and saw Abby rushing over to him. "Please don't die," she said, hugging him.

"I won't die, Abby," Gibbs said, hugging her back. "I promise."

"And don't let Tony die," Abby said, clinging to Gibbs.

"Dinozzo wouldn't dare," Gibbs replied. "We'll be back before you can miss us." Abby stepped back looking anxious.

"I really hate terrorists," she said. Gibbs gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Me too, Abs," he said getting into the elevator. "Me too."

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"What, Probie?!" Tony snapped after minutes of silence and awkward glances from McGee as he drove to Tony's apartment.

"I…" McGee stammered nervously. "Well, I was just wondering how you're doing." Tony looked at him irritably, feeling the after affects of too much alcohol. "How's your arm?"

"It's good," Tony lied, looking down at the dirty sling, a constant reminder of everything that he had been trying to drink away.

"Really?" McGee asked. "Because that kind of fracture is supposed to-"

"Hurt like a son of a bitch? Yeah, I know," Tony snapped.

"You know, you-" McGee started, trying to be helpful.

"How about you just shut up and drive," Tony snapped, clenching his jaw angrily. This was a side of him that McGee hadn't seen before. Tony looked wounded in every sense of the word. McGee did as he was told and drove to Tony's apartment building.

"I'll wait here," McGee said as Tony went into his room. Tony didn't reply. He went to his bedroom and closed the door behind him. McGee moved some fast food containers and sat on the couch staring awkwardly around the dirty, messed up apartment. Finally his eyes rested on some cracks and holes in one part of the wall. McGee had seen enough crime scenes to know that those holes in the wall were caused by fists. Tony had been punching holes in his own apartment walls and had done extensive damage. This was also uncharacteristic of him and only added to McGee's concerns. His thoughts were broken by his cell phone receiving a message. McGee checked it and was surprised by its contents.

"Hey Tony," he called out. "Gibbs says that we-"

"- aren't to tell Abby that Ziva's missing. I know. I got it too," Tony said moodily as he emerged from his room.

"We can't lie to her," McGee protested.

"It's not lying," Tony replied. "Abby doesn't know where Ziva is. Neither do we. All it'll do is worry her."

"I still think its wrong," McGee said as they left Tony's apartment. Tony slammed the door behind him. He glared at McGee and looked like he was about to strike out or yell. Instead, he clenched his jaw tighter and walked away angrily.

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Two hours later, after a thorough explanation of their mission from Vance and after saying goodbye to McGee and a tearful Abby, who had added a 'Gibbs' mop next to Tony and Ziva's mops, Gibbs and Tony along with a team of other agents found themselves onboard a navy aircraft bound for Somalia.

"When we touch down we'll board a helicopter for the USS Lincoln where we'll be staying," Gibbs said to Tony who nodded despondently. They sat in silence as the plane took off. Gibbs kept stealing glances at Tony who simply stared out of the window, looking as though he wouldn't instigate a single conversation for the duration of their journey.

"I take it that Ziva didn't contact you at all," Gibbs said after a few hours. Tony shook his head slightly.

"She hates me," he said quietly.

"No she doesn't," Gibbs replied, sure of himself.

"Trust me," Tony said, shaking his head bitterly. "You didn't see the look in her eyes."

"No, but I know Ziva," Gibbs said. "She knows who the good guys and the bad guys are and you're one of the good guys. But she walked in straight after you killed the guy she loved. She needed time to process that," Gibbs said. "She knows you." Tony looked sceptical.

"We're going to find her," Gibbs promised himself as much as he was promising Tony. "Ziva will not be missing by the time we leave Somalia, I don't give a damn what Vance's orders are."

_Ten hours later, as Gibbs, Dinozzo and the NCIS team arrived a mere twenty miles away, Ziva had made up her mind. Physically and emotionally she had been put through more than she had ever imagined and she had reached her breaking point. She wanted to be dead._

"_I will talk," she whispered to her captors who grinned satisfactorily. _

Thoughts?


	3. As Strong As You Are

Thank you so much to the reviewers. Your reviews really keep me motivated. It's great to know that you're enjoying this. Writing this fic is helping my sanity immensely while we wait for what seems like forever until season 7! Anyways, here's the latest chapter. Let me know your thoughts.

**CHAPTER 3 – As Strong as You Are**

"_I will talk," Ziva had said and as she said it she felt an immense sense of shame. Shame at betraying her country, Mossad, and, her father. Shame at betraying America, NCIS and Gibbs who had taught her how to be an investigator. It was a sense of shame that outstripped everything else that she was feeling at that time. The decision to talk had been so much easier to make in her head while she was being abused and violated but now that it was a reality, Ziva felt like the traitor that she was about to become. _

"_Amir," Hashim shouted out. "The bitch will talk." Ziva heard another man's villainous laughter and heavy footsteps as he approached. _

"_I knew you would break eventually," he said to her tauntingly, in Arabic. "Although, it has taken you longer than I expected. You are a difficult one. Your father's daughter." Ziva forced herself to lift her head as he approached her. Her eyes blurred as she tried to make out his face, despite her concussion, in the dimly lit room. At first she could have sworn that it was the face of her father, which slowly morphed into Ari as he came closer before changing to that of Rivkin and then Gibbs and then… Ziva gave a sharp intake of breath as she thought she saw Tony standing in front of her. As he bent down and she saw his blackened teeth, his sinister grin, his eyes full of hate, and so unlike Tony's, Ziva knew that she could not betray all that she had ever cared about to satisfy this evil man and his terror organization. _

"_Well," Amir said, leaning even closer to Ziva, his hot breath repugnant against her face. "I am waiting."_

"_I have nothing to say to you," Ziva replied through gritted teeth, preparing herself for the next onslaught. _

"Director," Gibbs said into the phone as he, Tony and the rest of the NCIS team were being airlifted to the USS Lincoln. He had Vance on speakerphone for Tony's benefit.

"There has been a development," Vance announced. "If the situation was not so serious you would be meeting with a Mossad officer but they need all hands on deck."

"What's happened?" Tony asked with great urgency in his voice.

"It looks like they've zeroed in on the terror cell's headquarters," Vance replied, giving him the location. "The closer that the Mossad officers have got to the zone, the more resistance they have encountered. This cell has men fighting to the death to protect whoever is in this building."

"What do you want us to do?" Gibbs asked.

"The Somalian government has been of no assistance," Vance announced. "They deny that they are harbouring terrorists. Marines have been sent into the zone. When they have finished fighting I want your team in there to assess the situation." Vance ended the call.

"We have a change of plan," Gibbs said to the helicopter pilot. He gave the pilot the coordinates just outside of where the terror cell was believed to be situated.

"Boss," Tony said, concerned. "We're not Marines. Don't you think that Vance would-?"

"If you don't want to go in there, Dinozzo-" Gibbs started.

"Oh I'm going in there," Tony answered, more determined than Gibbs had heard him in a long time.

"I know that they have Ziva," Gibbs said quietly.

"How?" One of the other agents asked as the helicopter began its descent.

"My gut," Gibbs replied, pulling out his gun.

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As Gibbs, Dinozzo and two other agents (the rest had chosen to stay on the helicopter) made their way through the dusty, sweltering conditions to the zone which they had been told about, an eerie feeling swept over them. It was quiet. Too quiet for the kind of activity which Vance had insisted was taking place. As they emerged closer to a building which simply looked like an abandoned warehouse, commonplace enough to be overlooked by unsuspecting passers by, they saw the first bodies. Whatever battle that had been taking place was over now.

Gibbs swallowed heavily as he saw the body of a marine, sprayed with bullets, lying lifeless on the ground. Ahead of him, seven bodies, of men and women, clothed in tan uniforms, presumably Mossad officers, lay sprawled at different distances from the building. As they crept even closer, more bodies were visible. The bodies were of North African men, matching the description of those who were members of the terror cell.

"I have a really bad feeling about this, boss," Tony whispered. Gibbs ignored him, not wanting to admit that he had the same feeling.

"I'm going in," Gibbs said to the others. Bravely, he took a step inside the dark, hot building and the others followed suit.

They crept through the cramped hallways, still hearing no sign of life, until they found themselves in the only lit room. There, they saw her.

Gibbs and Tony didn't need to see her face to know that the woman slumped in the chair was Ziva. There was another man strapped to a chair who was dead, and there were three lifeless bodies on the floor. Ziva appeared to be moving ever so slightly but both Gibbs and Tony weren't sure if she was alive or if they were willing themselves to see her moving.

"Ziva!" Tony shouted as they ran towards her. "Oh God!"

Ziva lifted her head slightly. _Tony?_ She thought. Once again her mind was playing cruel tricks on her. It couldn't possibly be him.

"She's been shot!" Tony shouted to Gibbs who ripped off his jacket and pressed it against Ziva's left shoulder where she was bleeding profusely. Tony brushed Ziva's hair out of her eyes with his hand and felt sick to his stomach when he saw the bruises on her face. He felt rage course through his veins like he had never felt before. He focussed on cutting Ziva free of her restraints while Gibbs pulled a water bottle from his pack and held it to Ziva's lips. She gratefully accepted, unable to remember if she had had anything to drink in all the time that she had been held prisoner.

When Tony had freed her of the restraints, Gibbs pulled Ziva from the chair and into his arms, pulling her close to him, overwhelmed with relief that she was alive.

"You're safe now," he promised her, as she slipped back into unconsciousness, having never been more serious about anything in his life.

Tony went to the man closest to Ziva, who was lying dead on the ground and kicked his head as hard as he could, wishing that the man could feel the pain being inflicted on him. Tony wanted him to suffer for the unforgiveable damage that he had inflicted on Ziva.

"Dinozzo!" Gibbs hushed him, only because he could hear people approaching. Gibbs placed Ziva gently on the ground and they drew their guns and pointed them at the doorway, waiting while their hearts pounded nervously. Suddenly the room was full of people.

"NCIS!" they screamed.

"US Marines!" the men and women who entered the room screamed back at them. Gibbs and Tony breathed a collective sigh of relief.

"One of our agents is down," Gibbs shouted at them. "We need to get her to a hospital." Before they could respond, Gibbs scooped unconscious Ziva up in his arms and ran with her, Tony alongside them, where they met two marines with a stretcher outside.

Ziva was placed on the stretcher and carried quickly to a waiting helicopter which had dropped off the Marines that they had confronted moments earlier. Gibbs and Tony climbed into the helicopter.

"We'll take her back to the USS Lincoln," one of the marines said to them as another marine radioed ahead and another marine worked on stabilizing Ziva. "We have a trauma surgeon on stand by." The marine saw the concern on Gibbs and Tony's faces. "She's the best trauma surgeon you could ask for," he said reassuringly. "Your agent couldn't be in better hands."

As if knowing that they were talking about her, Ziva suddenly stirred out of unconsciousness. She could barely see out of her swollen eyes and her shoulder felt as though it was on fire but she could hear familiar voices.

"Gibbs?" She moaned, wanting to believe that it was him. She forced her eyes open further and saw his familiar blue eyes, worried and staring back at her.

"Ziva," Gibbs said, leaning over her and comfortingly running his fingers through her hair. "We have you now. You're safe. It's all over."

"What the hell happened to her?" Tony asked.

"It looks like she was held captive for some time," one of the marines answered. "When they realized that they had been compromised they took their own lives. They didn't have much warning so it was all done in a panic. It looks like they've tried to shoot your agent in the heart but they've missed." Ziva nodded slightly, as if to confirm that's what had taken place.

"Bastards," Tony said through gritted teeth, seething with anger.

"Tony?" Ziva asked, sounding unsure. Still semi-conscious, she didn't know what she was hallucinating and what was real. She strained her neck to see if Tony really was there, causing her shoulder to feel as though it was being ripped in half. She cried out in pain.

"Ziva!" Tony said, rushing to her side. Ziva's breathing was rapid as the pain pulsated through her whole body. She still couldn't see him. Instead she reached out his hand and Tony took it.

"Ziva, I'm here," Tony said, his voice chocking with emotion. "Just hold on. We're almost there."


	4. Makes Her Older Than She Really Is

So, I think I'm becoming as addicted to writing this fic as I am to watching NCIS! Hope you enjoy this chapter. Please let me know what you think.

**CHAPTER 4- Makes Her Older Than She Really Is**

Ziva clung to Tony's hand as the pain ripped through her shoulder and radiated throughout her whole body. She could hear Gibbs talking to her but couldn't make out what he was saying as she slipped in and out of consciousness. His voice was enough of a comfort to remind her that she was safe for the time being.

"Cant you give her something for the pain?" Gibbs asked the marines, angrily. He knew that for Ziva to show the slightest hint of pain it had to be excruciating. Here she was, writhing in agony and unable to stay conscious and it distressed him to think of how much pain she was in. He had been shot in the shoulder before and he knew how much it hurt, let alone considering her countless other injuries.

"We have to wait until she's assessed by a doctor," one of the marines replied. "She's relatively stable, considering, so she should be able to go straight into surgery to remove the bullet."

"Beginning the descent to the USS Lincoln now," the pilot announced.

"Hang in there, Ziva," Gibbs whispered softly, breathing a sigh of relief. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you." Ziva nodded vaguely as the helicopter landed on board the massive navy vessel.

"They're expecting us," a marine said to Gibbs as more marines rushed over to the helicopter and opened the doors. "I need you both to step back." Gibbs didn't want to but he forced himself to step away from Ziva and let the marines do their jobs. "Dinozzo," Gibbs said when he noticed Tony's hand still interlocked with Ziva's. "She has to get into surgery."

Tony nodded and gently pried Ziva's hand away from his own, hating that he had to leave her when they had just got her back.

"I'll see you soon," he whispered to Ziva, unsure whether she had heard him as she was rushed away on the stretcher.

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"Abigail?" Ducky, arriving for work, asked as he walked around the bullpen where Abby was pacing around anxiously. "What's the matter?"

"Something's wrong, Ducky," Abby replied, wringing her hands.

"Where is everyone?" Ducky asked, looking around.

"McGee locked himself in the elevator to talk on the phone," Abby answered.

"Why on earth would he do that?" Ducky asked, confused.

"Because I kept grabbing the phone from him," Abby confessed, slightly embarrassed. "Something's happening, Ducky, and he won't let me in on it."

"Well, I'm sure there's a very good reason for that, my dear," Ducky said, hoping to calm Abby down.

"We're supposed to be working on communications while Gibbs and Tony are in Somalia but McGee's been completely shutting me out for the last hour. I don't think they've even landed on the USS Lincoln."

"Jethro and Tony are in Somalia?" Ducky asked, gobsmacked. "Why on earth? I take one day off and the man skips the country?"

"Something about a terror cell," Abby said, getting increasingly nervous. "I have a really bad feeling, Ducky."

"I wonder why he didn't tell me." Ducky said to himself. "That's not like Jethro."

The elevator doors opened and McGee stepped out looking anxious and relieved at the same time, if that was possible.

"What?" Abby asked with dread in her voice.

"They found her," McGee said, to himself, moreso then to Abby and Ducky.

"Found who?" Abby asked, anxiously. Then it hit her. "Ziva?!"

"Found her implies that she was missing, Timothy," Ducky said. McGee nodded and looked guiltily at Abby.

"Gibbs swore me to secrecy," he said, ashamed that he had lied to her.

"What happened?!" Abby asked, looking like she was either going to hit McGee or cry depending on what he had to say.

"The terror cell that Gibbs told us about," McGee explained. "Ziva was sent to take it out with Mossad but she went missing. They captured her. That was Tony on the phone and he said that they found Ziva at a warehouse. She was the only one left alive." He looked uncomfortable, not wanting to say the next part.

"What?" Abby asked with tears in her eyes.

"Oh Dear," Ducky said with dread in his voice, suspecting what had happened based on his vast experience working around the world.

"She's been tortured," McGee said. "Tony didn't give me exact details but…" he stammered. "But these kinds of guys… they're brutal…" his voice trailed off.

"Oh my God!" Abby said, covering her mouth with her hands.

"After they tortured her they shot her and killed themselves when their cell was discovered. The bullet hit her shoulder and she's on board the USS Lincoln now having surgery. They say she should pull through."

Abby burst into tears.

"Should?!" she asked, exasperated. "Should isn't good enough, McGee! What if she… Oh my God!"

"There, there," Ducky said, pulling Abby into a hug and trying to console her. "I'm sure that Ziva's in excellent hands and that she'll be just fine in time."

"They tortured her, Ducky!" Abby cried. "Who would want to do that to Ziva?"

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Tony stood back against the wall, reeling from the day's events.

"Dinozzo!" Gibbs said for the forth time. Tony finally heard him and looked up at his boss. "Are you alright?" Gibbs asked, genuinely concerned for his agent. Tony looked up wearily at Gibbs.

"No," he said with quiet anger. "No, I'm not alright." Before Gibbs could say whatever he was planning to say, Tony left the room and walked through the ship with no particular destination in mind. His head was spinning. Moments earlier, with Ziva still in surgery with Doctor Vanessa Schwartz, the doctor's Resident had given them an updated assessment of Ziva's injuries and her report had made Tony sick to his stomach.

_Repeated blunt force trauma… broken cheekbone… raped multiple times… internal bleeding… fractured ribs… possible nerve damage in the left shoulder region… significant blood loss… transfusion… _

As Tony heard these words he felt as though his heart was being ripped out of chest. Somehow, the men who had done this to Ziva being dead wasn't enough. He seethed with rage and wanted them to be punished. He wanted to be the one to hurt them and destroy them piece by piece just as they had tried to do to his partner. How dare they take the easy way out?

Tony found an empty room and closed the door behind him. His hands were shaking with anger. He needed to hit something or someone. Trying desperately to compose himself the way he used to be able to when he was the swift, comedic Special Agent Anthony Dinozzo in what felt like another life, Tony took a deep breath and closed his eyes. When he closed them all he could see was those men hurting Ziva. How long had she been at their mercy while he sat back in Washington waiting for her to call him? Why didn't he try and stop her from staying in Israel in the first place? A million _what if's_ flashed though his mind and before Tony consciously realized what he was doing he was pounding the wall with his fist, stopping only when the pain became unbearable and he sank into the floor. For the first time in years he felt tears streaming down his face and sobs escaping his exhausted body.

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Two hours later, with Tony not wanting to be found, Gibbs finally met with Doctor Vanessa Schwartz, a fiery redhead, which he barely noticed due to his concern for his agent.

"How is she?" he asked anxiously.

"She hasn't woken up yet," Doctor Schwartz answered. "But it won't be long now. It would be nice for her to wake up to a familiar face." Gibbs nodded. "We removed the bullet and the infection isn't as bad as first thought. It should heal well but there is the possibility of some residual nerve damage which could affect the use of her left arm in the future. Her other injuries should heal nicely in time. However, psychologically…" her voice trailed off. Gibbs nodded, understanding. How were they ever going to bring Ziva back from what she had been though? Gibbs thanked Doctor Schwartz and went into the sterile room where Ziva was lying peacefully on a bed, hooked up to machines which were replenishing her emaciated body with fluids and nutrients as well as painkillers to make the transition into consciousness less stressful on her battered body. Her face was so bruised and swollen that she was almost unrecognizable. Gibbs sat in a chair next to Ziva's bed and gently took her hand in his.

As soon as Ziva felt her body come into contact with another's her eyes snapped open and she was immediately on guard, sitting up straight and twisting Gibbs' arm harshly.

"Whoa," Gibbs said, surprised by her sudden and violent alertness. "Ziva, its Gibbs." Ziva's heart was pounding and she forced herself to breathe normally as she adjusted to her surroundings and loosened her grip on Gibbs.

"Sorry," she said quietly as she gingerly layed down on the bed again, her shoulders still tense. Gibbs tried his best to ignore his sprained wrist, moving closer to Ziva and sitting on the side of her bed, next to her. "Where's my gun?" Ziva asked, looking around anxiously.

"You didn't have it on you when we found you," Gibbs explained.

"I need my weapon," Ziva said anxiously, looking around the room.

"You're safe here, Ziva," Gibbs explained. "You're on the USS Lincoln, surrounded by marines. No one is going to hurt you."

"I always have my weapon," Ziva said irritably, looking around as though she was expecting to be attacked at any moment. Gibbs pulled his own gun out of its holster.

"Take mine," he said, handing it to Ziva who placed it underneath her pillow. Gibbs wondered whether he was doing the right thing, giving her a loaded weapon while she was so jumpy but he understood that she needed to feel safe after all that she had been through.

"How much do you remember?" Gibbs asked gently. The traumatized look that crossed Ziva's face for a brief moment convinced him that she remembered it all.

"I don't wish to talk about it," Ziva answered. Gibbs nodded. Ziva stared at the ceiling before looking back at Gibbs, deciding to tell him one thing. "I didn't tell them anything, Gibbs" she told him, wide eyed. "They wanted to know things about NCIS but I didn't say a word. I promise that I didn't betray you."

"I know," Gibbs said with a nod.

"Because they did not kill me," Ziva reasoned.

"No, Ziva," Gibbs said. "Because I know you. I've always trusted you and that's never changed." Gibbs thought that he saw Ziva's eyes brim with grateful tears for a brief moment before she blinked them away and resumed staring at the ceiling, her whole body tense.

"You need to rest," Gibbs said to her.

"I can't close my eyes," Ziva confessed in a whisper, unable to look at Gibbs while she revealed what she perceived to be a weakness.

"What if I stay here?" Gibbs asked gently, resting his hand on the side of Ziva's face comfortingly. "Will you try and get some rest if I stand guard? You know that I wouldn't let anyone hurt you. Dinozzo's around somewhere. I can have him guard the door."

_Tony, _Ziva thought, remembering holding his hand on the helicopter.

"Plus," Gibbs continued, "You're surrounded by armed marines on high alert. I promise you that if you go to sleep you'll wake up here and no one will get anywhere near you." Ziva knew that Gibbs was telling the truth. As alert and traumatized as her mind was, her body was exhausted and she needed to rest. After thinking it over, she nodded, putting her trust in Gibbs while she tried to untense her body.

"Before I fall asleep," Ziva said to Gibbs. "Has my father called at all?" Gibbs had been hoping that Ziva wouldn't ask that just yet.

"Not yet," he replied, sadly. "I've left some messages with him. Hopefully soon." Ziva nodded, wiping a stubborn tear away as she closed her eyes and felt her body drift back into merciful slumber.

_- Thoughts?_


	5. I Know What It Means

Here's the next chapter. I've started having dreams about this fic which give me ideas. Obsessed much lol? Please review for me. I'd love to know what you think.

**CHAPTER 5- I Know What It Means**

Gibbs sat watching Ziva as she slept. When she had been awake, as much as she tried to hide it, she seemed terrified and traumatized. Now that she was sleeping, she seemed so peaceful by comparison. About half an hour after Ziva had fallen asleep, Gibbs heard footsteps outside the room. He readied himself in case Ziva woke up suddenly and grabbed the gun which she had clutched in her hand underneath the pillow for security. Thankfully she didn't wake up as Tony entered the room.

"I was about to send a search party," Gibbs said to him, deciding against telling Tony how terrible he looked.

"How is she?" Tony asked, offering no explanation for his absence.

"Shaken up," Gibbs answered. Tony walked over to Ziva's side, feeling anger course though his veins once again as he saw her bruised and battered face. He gently reached down to where her hand was.

"I wouldn't," Gibbs said to him. He raised his swollen wrist, where Ziva had grabbed him when he had tried to touch her. Tony nodded and sat down next to Ziva. "She has my gun," Gibbs warned him.

"Was that wise?" Tony asked, sceptically.

"Would you want to sleep without a gun if you were in her shoes, Dinozzo?" Gibbs asked.

"I guess not," Tony replied.

"I need to make a call," Gibbs said. "I'll just be outside. Get me if she wakes up, alright?" Tony nodded. "No sudden movements around her," Gibbs warned. "Don't stand over her. And don't let her shoot anyone."

"I'll do my best, boss," Tony said as Gibbs took one last concerned look at Ziva and stepped outside.

When he was outside, Gibbs pulled his phone out of his pocket. He had ignored six calls from Vance, knowing that he would be reprimanded for disobeying orders when he had gone into the warehouse instead of to the USS Lincoln when they had arrived in Somalia. Gibbs would deal with Vance later. He couldn't bring himself to regret their actions because they had found Ziva. There was plenty of time to deal with Vance.

He dialled the number to Abby's lab and she picked up almost straight away.

"Gibbs!" She said into the phone. "Oh my God! How's Ziva?"

"You heard?" Gibbs asked.

"Tony told McGee," Abby replied. "And I should be mad at you for lying to me but I'm more worried about Ziva."

"She's resting," Gibbs said. "And she's safe now."

"You can't let her go again, Gibbs," Abby said. "Not this time."

"I don't intend to," Gibbs said honestly. "Look, Abs, I need you to do a job for me. There's a number that I need to find."

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Within ten minutes, through means which Gibbs didn't quite understand, Abby had managed to track down Eli David's personal cell phone number. Apparently he had several but this was the one needed to reach him directly. Gibbs dialled the number and almost immediately, Eli picked up.

"Shalom," he said.

"Shalom, Eli," Gibbs responded.

"Who is this?" Eli asked, confused.

"Special Agent Gibbs from NCIS," Gibbs replied. There was a pause on the other end of the line as Eli wondered how Gibbs had found that number, but he chose not to say anything.

"Hello Agent Gibbs. How is Ziva?" Eli asked.

"Quite frankly I was starting to wonder if you were ever going to ask that question," Gibbs said, trying not to sound as resentful as he felt toward the Director of Mossad.

"I received your messages, Agent Gibbs," Eli explained. "And I am grateful to the Americans for bringing her to safety, but I have an agency to run. And she is okay, yes? For the last few hours I have been telling families that they will never see their children again. That they died trying to rescue my child. I must clean up this mess."

"This mess is not Ziva's fault," Gibbs said with quiet anger.

"I am not saying that it is, my friend," Eli said. "But somebody on the mission must have failed; otherwise they would not have been captured." He paused for a moment. "May I speak with her?"

"She's asleep," Gibbs answered, protectively.

"Could you please wake her?" Eli asked. "I need to know what she told them," Eli said. "She is the only remaining witness. We have to plan our next move."

"She's exhausted," Gibbs said with quiet anger. "From being tortured."

"But she is okay, yes?" Eli asked.

"Being alive is not the same as being okay," Gibbs snapped. "If those bastards had been holding my daughter, nothing would stop me from getting to her. Nothing! And not so that I could plan my next strategic move." He hung up on Eli before he could respond. Gibbs was too angry to go back to Ziva straight away so he went out on deck and watched the water. The sea had always been able to clam him like nothing else could. Gibbs wondered what his own next move would be.

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It was impossible for Tony not to overhear Gibbs' angry conversation with Eli David. From his tone he knew that that was who Gibbs had to be talking to. It angered Tony to think that Gibbs felt more paternal towards Ziva at that time than her own father might. He hoped that he was wrong, for Ziva's sake. Suddenly his phone, in his pocket, received a text message and the noise caused Ziva to start stirring. Her eyelids flicked and then opened.

At first everything was blurry and she didn't know where she was. Then she saw the hazy figure of a man beside her. It wasn't Gibbs. Ziva clutched the gun tightly in her hand, under the pillow, and sat up suddenly. Before she could raise the gun to his head, he grabbed her arm, matching her in strength.

"Ziva, it's Tony," he said, not sure whether this was enough to make Ziva not want to shoot him. In Israel she had been furious at him for killing Rivkin. Tony breathed a sigh of relief when Ziva's stone hard face softened in recognition and her arm went limp.

"Sorry," she muttered, embarrassed.

"Don't worry about it," Tony replied. Ziva placed the gun back under her pillow and slowly positioned herself back on the bed until she was comfortable. "Good to know your reflexes are as good as always." Ziva didn't respond to this. "Can I get you anything?" Tony asked. "Water?" Ziva nodded and Tony poured her a glass of water from the pitcher sitting on her bedside table. Ziva took it gratefully and as she drank, Tony couldn't help but notice the bruises up her arms. She had fought like hell.

"Thank you," Ziva said when she was finished. Tony took the glass from her. "May I ask what you and Gibbs are doing in Somalia?" she asked.

"Those guys who had you were planning on attacking American navel ships," Tony answered. "Then we heard that you were missing and Gibbs changed our agenda. That cell is no longer an issue thanks to Mossad and the US Marines." There was an awkward silence between them as they both wondered how to approach everything that had transpired between them before Ziva's departure from NCIS.

"Well, I'm glad that you were here… that you are here," Ziva said, staring at her restless hands as she spoke.

"Really?" Tony asked. "I thought you never wanted to see me again." Ziva shook her head.

"I owe you an apology, Tony," she said, finally looking into his eyes and noticing how much older he looked, sleep deprived and unshaven. After staring into the cold, merciless eyes of her captors, Tony's eyes looked noticeably kind, yet pained.

"No you don't," Tony said. "I get it. I killed the man you love."

"Loved," Ziva said quietly. "Past tense. And he was keeping things from me. I know that you were doing your job and that you only killed him because you had to. In Israel I basically called you a murderer and for that I am sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Tony said. "Past tense. I never should have let you go without a fight. You're my partner and I left you behind."

"I never would have listened if you'd tried to get me to board that plane," Ziva said frankly and Tony managed a laugh. "Past tense," Ziva said.

"So where do we go from here?" Tony asked uncomfortably. He saw Ziva tense up as the sound of heavy footsteps could be heard getting closer to them. "It's okay," Tony said comfortingly. He pulled his gun out of its holster to show Ziva that she was safe. "Just… don't shoot," he said to her. "I'll take care of it." Ziva didn't relax at all, her hand was still clutching Gibbs' gun as Tony went to the door. He turned the corner and ran straight into Gibbs who was holding coffee. The coffee spilled onto the floor. Gibbs glared at Tony.

"Some things never change," he muttered to himself.

"Sorry, boss," Tony said as a passing marine went to get the janitor. "I'll get you another one."

"Not yet," Gibbs said to Tony, indicating that he should go back into Ziva's room. Tony did so and followed Gibbs. "I told you to tell me when she woke up, Dinozzo" Gibbs said to Tony as he sat on the side of Ziva's bed and looked at her with concern.

"Sorry, boss," Tony said as Gibbs brushed a strand of Ziva's hair out of her eyes with his hand.

"Your father sends his love," he said to her.

"You're lying," Ziva replied. Gibbs looked puzzled. "You're actually a pretty good liar, Gibbs," she said. "My father just doesn't send messages like that. What did he say?"

"Well he did ask about you," Gibbs said, trying to cover his tracks.

"Yes, I bet he wants to know all about the terror cell, the building and what I told them so that he can send more Officers out to take over." Gibbs was quiet for a moment and then decided against lying to her.

"You know him well," he said.

"Unfortunately," Ziva replied, sounding disappointed.

"Ziva, I'm sorry," Gibbs said, sympathetically.

"It's okay," Ziva replied, although she didn't sound okay. "He does care. He just shows it differently. He has a lot of responsibilities."

"Look, Ziva," Gibbs said. "I know that this probably isn't the best time but I want you to know that I want you back at NCIS. Your father fought for you to stay at Mossad and I didn't fight back. I let you go and I regret it."

"You're one of the best agents that I've ever worked with," Tony said sincerely, resuming his seat on the chair beside Ziva's bed. "I miss you," he added quietly. "So do Abby and McGee and Ducky and Palmer. Abby's taken to bringing out the mops again. She really misses you." Ziva almost managed a smile as she thought of Abby.

"I have responsibilities to my country," Ziva said quietly. Then images of the unspeakable horror that she had been through the past week flashed through her mind and she struggled to retain her composure.

"Israel and America are fighting the same war," Gibbs said softly. "You can serve your country from the US."

Once again, Ziva froze as she heard footsteps in the hallway and instinctively, Tony took her hand to calm her. Ziva didn't protest.

"Ms David," a nurse said, appearing in the doorway. I have your father on the phone."


	6. And I'll Carry You Home

Hey there. Here's the next chapter for you. Also, does anyone know if Ziva's mother has been mentioned on the show? I thought of maybe mentioning something here but I don't want it to conflict with something that might have been said on the show. I don't remember her ever being mentioned but I just want to double check. Also, I really appreciate feedback. It helps me a lot with my writing and where I take the story so if you have any thoughts please let me know. Anyway, enough from me. Hope you guys are still enjoying this.

**CHAPTER 6 – And I'll Carry You Home**

"We'll step outside," Gibbs said as the nurse handed the phone to Ziva. As protective as he felt towards her in that moment, he thought that giving her some privacy would be the right thing to do. Ziva looked a little concerned about being left alone.

"We won't be far away," Tony reassured her. Ziva mustered up all the courage that she could and spoke into the phone, trying to keep her voice level.

"Shalom, Papa," they heard her say.

"You can't let her go back to Israel," Tony said to Gibbs as they stepped outside. He didn't care that he was out of line. "She's not ready. Her father will just use her and send her back out there."

"I want her back at NCIS as much as you do," Gibbs replied. "But ultimately, it's her choice, Dinozzo."

"It's the wrong choice," Tony said, angrily. "Ziva was a soldier. She's so used to taking orders from people, from her father, that she doesn't stop for a minute to think about what she might actually want for herself."

"What do you want me to do, Dinozzo?" Gibbs asked, calmly. "Kidnap her?"

"If you have to," Tony snapped angrily. He hit the wall in front of him with the palm of his hand.

"Would you stop hitting everything?" Gibbs asked, irritated. He gave Tony a warning look, indicating that Tony's many evident issues would be brought up again. "Stay here and keep an eye on Ziva." Gibbs took his cell phone out of his pocket and dialled Vance's number.

"Agent Gibbs," Vance said, bemused, as he answered the phone. "Long time, no speak."

"I've been a little busy," Gibbs replied.

"So I've heard," Vance said. There was silence on the line.

"Well?" Gibbs asked.

"Well, what?" Vance asked. "You called me."

"Aren't you gonna yell or whatever it is that you do when I defy your orders?" Gibbs asked.

"Normally I would," Vance confirmed. "However, I have to make an exception this time."

"Why?" Gibbs asked, confused. He thought that Vance would just yell and get it over with.

"Because you're being awarded the Congressional Gold Medal," Vance announced. "You've impressed a lot of people with the way that you took charge and went into the danger zone, risking your own life to save Officer David and protect American navel interests from this terror cell." Gibbs was dumbstruck.

"They were all dead, Director," he replied. "There was no threat to my safety." He paused for a moment. "I don't want it."

"That's not up for you to decide, Agent Gibbs," Vance said, seeming to enjoy this. "The Congressional Gold Medal will bring ample good publicity to NCIS. It's just what we need." Gibbs groaned, unimpressed, sure that Vance was doing this purely because he knew of Gibbs' aversion to publicity.

"Can you get us out of here?" Gibbs asked, changing the subject so that he wouldn't say something he'd regret later.

"I can have your team picked up tomorrow," Vance said.

"I want Ziva David on that flight as well, Director," Gibbs said. "She's injured. Make sure that they can accommodate her." Gibbs hung up the phone and went out on deck.

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Tony stood outside Ziva's room, listening to her talking in Hebrew to her father on the phone. He was unable to understand any of what she was saying. She was keeping her tone neutral, almost too deliberately, he could tell. When she had been silent for a few minutes he peeked around the doorway and saw Ziva lying on her side, on her injured shoulder, facing away from him.

"It's just me," he said as he entered the room again, a little concerned that she would sit up suddenly and shoot him. Ziva didn't respond. "You're lying on your injured shoulder," Tony said as he approached her. "Now I know you're a tough little Israeli but that's just crazy." Ziva still didn't respond. "Come on, Ziva, stop showing off," Tony said, approaching her. He saw her briefly raise her hand to her face and it was then that he realized that she was crying. Tony had never seen Ziva cry. Usually when she got upset she got angry and aggressive. He still had the bruises from where she had pushed him to the ground and hit him in Israel. This was new territory for him. She looked broken.

"Ziva," Tony said, his tone softening. "Talk to me." Tony was surprised that Ziva didn't tell him to go away. "Can you at least stop lying on your injured shoulder?" he asked as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Mine's hurting just thinking about it." Tony gently placed his hand on Ziva's other shoulder to help her to roll onto her back but as he touched her, as soon as she felt that gentle, kind human contact, a sob escaped her.

"It's okay," Tony said softly, not knowing if it was. "What happened?" He helped Ziva to roll onto her back and to sit up against the pillows.

Ziva tried to calm herself. Part of her hated that she was showing weakness but the other part of her was too exhausted and traumatized to realize.

"What happened?" Tony asked her again, sitting down on the chair beside her bed. "What did he say to you?" Ziva took a shaky breath.

"Just not what a daughter needed to hear from her father," she replied sadly. "It was mostly business." She took another shaky breath. "I am thinking about taking Gibbs up on his offer to return to NCIS," she said as matter of factly as she could. "My father does not trust me as a field officer anymore and will just sit me behind a desk out of the way. I know that I have more to offer than that."

"I know that you do too," Tony said with a nod. Ziva sighed.

"He says that I'm lucky to be alive." Tony thought back to when they had found Ziva tied, semi conscious, to that chair. He thought of her injuries.

"I'd have to agree with him on that," he said. Ziva's face suddenly crumpled with emotion.

"Then why do I wish that I wasn't?" she whispered, covering her face with her hands so that Tony couldn't see her cry.

Tony's heart broke when he heard her say this. He moved closer to her, sitting on the bed beside her.

"Ziva, if you died," he began softly, but his voice caught in his throat with emotion. "I couldn't…" he continued, his voice trailing off. "Thank God you're alive," he finally managed to say. Ziva moved her hands away from her tear streaked face.

"Is that really so hard to say?" she asked. Tony looked confused. "That's all that my father needed to say. That he was glad I was still alive." Tony sighed sadly as he watched Ziva's eyes fill with fresh tears. He didn't know what to say or how he could help her, just that he would give anything to be able to. He moved closer to Ziva, sitting beside her on the bed and put his arm around her shoulders, careful not to aggravate her injury.

Ziva instinctively nestled closer to Tony, which surprised them both for a moment. As investigators, they knew that women who had been attacked by men tended to keep their distance from other men in the aftermath, even men who they usually trusted. But even after everything that had happened, including Tony killing Rivkin, Ziva instinctively felt safe around him. She also felt safe around Gibbs and knew that if she went back to NCIS she would feel comfortable in the company of McGee, Ducky, Palmer and any other man whom she might come into contact with. They were her family.

"You're gonna be okay," Tony said to her as he held her close to his strong chest. More tears streaked down Ziva's face as she listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. "We'll get you back to Washington, find you a new place and get you settled in. You'll have no reason to ever look back on all this. I…" he paused for a moment. "We… we love you and I know you hate accepting help from others but we're gonna give it to you anyway. Pretty soon we'll be gluing McGee's fingers to his keyboard and fighting over who gets to drive." Ziva managed her first small smile in weeks at those NCIS memories. She took a deep, shaky breath.

"Promise me something," she said to Tony.

"What's that?" he asked.

"That you don't tell anyone that you saw me upset… or that I said the things I said or…"

"Acted like a human being?" Tony asked. Ziva glared at him. "Okay, fine," he said. "On one condition."

"What?" Ziva asked.

"That you move over," Tony said. "Gibbs' gun is digging into my ass." Ziva managed a slight giggle as she moved over on the bed and Tony moved closer to her, pulling her close to him.

Twenty minutes later when Gibbs had finally managed to get away from the USS Lincoln's extremely chatty Navigation Officer, he was surprised to find Tony and Ziva curled up on the hospital bed together, sleeping. Tony's arm was around Ziva and her head rested against his chest. They both looked more peaceful than he had seen either of them look since Rivkin had shown up in the US. Gibbs breathed a sigh of relief at the thought that they might just get through this and headed off to the sleeping quarters to get some rest himself.

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"She's coming back! She's coming back! She's coming back! She's coming back!" Ducky and Palmer heard Abby before they saw her.

"Abby, the handbook specifies that there is to be no running in the building," McGee called out after her. "You could fall over and-"

"But she's coming back, McGee!" Abby shouted happily. She rushed into autopsy where Ducky and Palmer were in the middle of examining their patients' stomach contents. McGee followed her.

"Ziva's coming back!" Abby announced happily.

"So I hear," Palmer said.

"Who told you?" Abby asked, confused. "Oh it doesn't matter. I really didn't think that Gibbs would come through this time but he did. We're all going to be together again!" Abby was grinning. "I'm taking a collection so that we can buy balloons and flowers for her."

"That sounds like a lovely idea," Ducky said, turning around and giving Abby a smile. His gloved hands were covered in blood. "I'm a little busy at the moment, my dear, but my wallet is in my jacket pocket over there. Just take whatever you think is sufficient."

"Thank you, Ducky," Abby said, taking twenty dollars from Ducky's wallet.

"Isn't that a lot of trouble to go to?" Palmer asked. "I mean, she's only been gone just over a week."

"You really shouldn't have said that," McGee warned him with a shake of the head. Palmer looked confused as Abby glared at him. Abby marched over to Palmer's jacket, picked took a one hundred dollar note from his wallet and stormed out of autopsy. McGee shook his head at Palmer once again and followed Abby.

"Did I say something wrong?" Palmer asked Ducky, bewildered.

"The poor girl was held captive by an African terror cell for a week, Jimmy," Ducky said. "Perhaps you could be a bit more considerate."

"She what?!" Palmer asked, bewildered. "No one tells me anything around here!" He looked at the doorway where Abby and McGee had left. "I think I'll be giving Abby another one hundred dollars for balloons and flowers," Palmer said, guiltily.

"Yes, I think that's a good idea," Ducky replied. He looked down at the body in front of them. "Shall we continue, Mr. Palmer?"

_- Thoughts?_


	7. Under the Stars and Stripes

I'm glad that you guys seemed to enjoy the last chapter. Especially Jimmy being kept out of the loop on everything. Poor Jimmy lol. I'm glad that Tony and Ziva have made peace with each other now, so I can kind of move on to the next part of the story. Hope you enjoy this chapter. Please review 

**Chapter 7- Under the Stars and Stripes**

The next morning, in Somalia, an American cargo plane arrived at the airstrip ready to transport the NCIS team back to Washington. Doctor Schwartz had been reluctant to give Ziva clearance to fly so soon after her surgery but was persuaded by Director Vance who promised that a nurse would be on board the plane and would monitor Ziva, whose condition was now classed as stable, at all times.

"I can walk," Ziva said, stubbornly when she was offered a wheelchair at the airstrip as she was about to get out of the car.

"Some things never change," Gibbs said in regard to Ziva's trademark independence. He offered his arm to her and knowing that she couldn't get out of the car on her own just yet, she took it. As Ziva stepped out of the car, she dropped the bag full of medication that Doctor Schwartz had given her. Bottles spilled out onto the ground.

"I can get them," Ziva insisted but Gibbs beat her to it.

"Ziva," he said as he stood up, holding one of the bottles out to her. It was her pain medication. "This is still sealed."

"I do not need it," Ziva insisted, stubbornly. Gibbs looked sceptical.

"If you don't need it," Gibbs said, "why are you holding your arm like that?" Ziva knew what Gibbs was talking about. Her arm was jutted out on a slight angle, and wouldn't move much further without sending a wave of pain through her. Gibbs unsealed the bottle.

"The pills make me tired," Ziva contended. "And not as alert."

"Because you need the rest," Gibbs replied.

"I do not like my senses being dulled," Ziva said

"You're safe," Gibbs said, handing her two of the pain pills and a bottle of water from his pack. Ziva looked as though she was about to challenge him but the constant throbbing of her shoulder silenced her. She took the pills and the water and swallowed them. Gibbs watched her, making sure that she wasn't pretending.

Suddenly they heard the sound of a car approaching them. It screeched to a halt and Tony, cleanly shaven and dressed very nicely jumped out of the back seat.

"Sorry I'm late, boss," he said. "Slept through my alarm. It happens to the best of us." Gibbs gave Tony his trademark stare. "Except for you, boss," Tony added sheepishly.

"On the plane, now," Gibbs ordered him.

"On your six, boss," Tony said, following Gibbs and Ziva. "Morning, Ziva," he added before rushing ahead and boarding the plane. Gibbs smiled to himself, relieved to have the old Agent Dinozzo back.

"Ducky!" Tony said, surprised as he stepped on board the cargo plane. He stuck his head back out to where Gibbs and Ziva were approaching the plane. "Ducky's here!" he announced.

"Ducky?" Ziva asked confused.

"Good morning Ziva, good morning Jethro," Ducky said, cheerfully, sticking his head outside. "Glorious weather, I must say."

"What are you doing here?" Gibbs asked him.

"The nurse that was supposed to board this flight came down with a rather nasty case of food poisoning," Ducky explained. "I bet it was the Russian place down the road. You know, the last time that I went there I-"

"Duck," Gibbs impatiently interrupted him.

"Yes, well," Ducky said, getting back on topic, "she was unable to fly and Ziva's doctor aboard the USS Lincoln wouldn't let her fly without medical supervision so the Director asked me to accompany her. I don't think any of my patients will mind if I delay their appointments for a few hours." Tony smiled at Ducky's joke.

"Well, she couldn't be in better hands," Gibbs said as he and Tony helped Ziva to climb into the plane. The other members of their team followed.

"How are you, my dear?" Ducky said sympathetically as he came face to face with Ziva. Ziva looked away uncomfortably, not wanting to address the question. Ducky gently rested his hand on the side of her bruised face, visibly upset by the damage done to her.

"She's gonna be okay," Gibbs said, rubbing Ziva's back comfortingly. "Come on, let's get you sitting down."

"I am fine," Ziva said. She hated being fussed over. She walked with Tony to one of the hard seats.

"Over here, Ziva," Ducky said, Ziva looked over to where Ducky had prepared a makeshift hospital bed.

"I do not need to lie down on a bed, Ducky," Ziva insisted. "I am fine to sit." Ducky picked up a pillow and brought it over to where Ziva was. "A compromise," he said, handing it to her. Ziva sighed and took the pillow, placing it behind her before she sat next to Tony. Ducky sat on her other side, holding a piece of medical equipment.

"I'm just going to take your blood pressure before we take off," he explained.

"Is that really necessary?" Ziva asked.

"Yes," Gibbs said, from where he was sitting opposite them. Ziva extended her arm to Ducky who tried to ignore his shock at the nasty bruises covering it.

"It's a little high," Ducky said. "But I guess that's to be expected given everything that you've been through." Ziva looked embarrassed. "Your pulse is a little fast as well," Ducky said. "I'll continue to monitor you throughout the flight." Ziva nodded, hoping that Ducky would stop fussing over her. He seemed to read her mind, standing up and taking a seat beside Gibbs, opposite Tony and Ziva. Ziva yawned, as she started to feel the effects of the pain medication. Tony took the pillow out from behind her and placed it on his legs. He patted the pillow, indicating for Ziva to lie down. Her tired body suddenly relished the thought of lying down. She carefully changed her position, resting her head on the pillow, lying on her uninjured shoulder, and Tony placed his arm protectively around her.

"Get some rest," he said softly. Ziva yawned again, feeling herself sliding into unconsciousness.

"Well, they certainly seem to be getting along better," Ducky commented to Gibbs.

"Hmm," Gibbs murmured, wondering what to make of this sudden closeness between his agents.

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_10 hours later_

"We'll be landing in around two hours," Gibbs said to his team. Tony nodded and Ziva murmured something inaudible. She had just woken up and was still groggy. Suddenly, she remembered something. Ziva sat up and reached down in front of her, grabbing the bag which held her medication. However, instead of pulling out her pills, she grabbed a tube of foundation and some concealing powder which a female petty officer had let her take.

"Could somebody please help me?" she asked. Gibbs, Tony and Ducky looked confused as to what they were helping her with. "I don't want to scare Abby," Ziva explained. "If she sees my face and my arms how they are, it will upset her. I want to cover as much of the bruising as I can, but I don't have a mirror."

"Well I should be able to help you with that, my dear," Ducky said. "After all, it is my area of expertise." Gibbs and Tony looked at Ducky, surprised at his revelation. "Not on myself!" Ducky said defensively. "Dear God, no. I meant, on the dead."

"Well, that's more experience than I have," Tony conceded.

"Me too," Gibbs added. Ducky moved closer to Ziva and took the make up from her.

"Let's see what we can do for you, my dear," he said.

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Nearly three hours later, after having herself checked over by Ducky once more after landing, Ziva found herself in the elevator at NCIS with Tony, Gibbs and Ducky.

"You should take a step back," Tony advised her, when they had almost reached their floor.

"Why?" Ziva asked.

"Just trust me," Tony replied. Ziva took a step back and Tony stood in front of her. When the elevator doors opened, Tony stepped forward and took the brunt of Abby's hug as she leaped at him. "That's why," Tony said, grimacing in pain. "Fractured arm, Abs," he reminded her.

"I'm sorry!" Abby said, stepping back. "I expected you to be Ziva."

"No leaping at Ziva," Tony warned her. "She has a gunshot wound, remember?" Abby nodded, eagerly trying to look behind Tony. He stepped to the side and Ziva stepped out of the elevator.

"Hello, Abby," Ziva said, putting her bravest face on as Gibbs and Ducky exited the elevator as well. Abby tried not to react to all the bruising which was still partially visible under the make up that Ziva was wearing. However, her eyes betrayed her, filling with tears.

"I'm so glad you're back!" she said, gently putting her arms around Ziva and hugging her. "I missed you!"

"I missed you too," Ziva said, trying to keep her voice steady. Just days earlier she had thought that she would never see Abby again.

"Hi, Ziva," McGee said nervously from behind where Abby was standing when Abby finally let go of Ziva. He wanted to hug her but he wasn't sure whether it was a good idea after everything that had happened to her. McGee shot a nervous look at Tony who nodded, convincing McGee that it was okay.

"Hello, McGee," Ziva said back, trying to manage a small smile. "I missed you as well."

"Likewise," McGee said as he carefully hugged Ziva. "It's so good to have you back."

"She might be back, but she's not back on duty just yet," Gibbs warned Ziva as much as he was warning the others.

"Come over here," Abby said, taking Ziva's hand. "I want to show you something." Ziva allowed Abby to lead her over to her desk where helium balloons were tied to everything that was weighed down and other balloons had been placed on the floor. On Ziva's desk sat a gigantic teddy bear, at least four feet tall.

"Whoa, that's a big bear," Tony said, amazed.

"I think that you can thank Mr. Palmer for that," Ducky mused.

"Abby, this is too much," Ziva said, touched and surprised by all the trouble that Abby had gone to. There was even a cake on the desk, surrounded by flowers in brightly coloured arrangements.

"Nothing is too much for you," Abby replied with a smile.

"I don't know what to say," Ziva said. "You really didn't have to go to all this trouble. You have a heart of gold, Abby."

"That she does," Tony agreed. "Let's have some cake!"

Suddenly the autopsy doors opened and Palmer raced out.

"I'm sorry!" he said, apologetically. "I got carried away with the paperwork and I-" he stopped sharply as he stood on a balloon and it burst loudly. The noise, not sounding dissimilar to that of a gunshot, caused Ziva to drop to the ground; a reflex reaction after the gunshots which she had been exposed to in the previous days. She winced in pain as she landed on her left arm, causing pain to rush through her shoulder. A patch of blood appeared on her shirt, a result of her stitches being ripped out from the fall.

"Ziva!" Gibbs and Tony said simultaneously, shocked, reaching out to help her to her feet.

"I'm fine," Ziva said, her face turning red from embarrassment. She was trembling all over and it was clear that she was not fine. She tried to stand on her own but couldn't. This only added to the embarrassment and helplessness that she was feeling. Ziva reluctantly allowed Gibbs and Tony to help her to her feet. She looked at the faces of her shocked colleagues but didn't know what to say to them so instead she turned and walked away.

"Ziva!" Ducky called after her. "Your stitches!" Ziva ignored him and kept walking.

Abby walked over to Palmer and punched him in the arm.

"Nice work," she said, viciously.

_Thoughts?_


	8. If She Had Wings She Would Fly Away

Thanks for the reviews! They're very much appreciated and they help me shape the story. I hope that you enjoy this chapter. Please let me know what you think.

**Chapter 8- If She Had Wings She Would Fly Away**

"I'll go," Abby said to Gibbs. "She might want to talk to another girl." Gibbs shook his head. "But she went into the ladies room!" Abby protested.

"You don't know what she's been through, Abs," he replied. "You weren't there."

"Then tell me!" Abby insisted.

"You don't wanna know," Tony said. "Trust me." This only made Abby worry more.

"I should go," Ducky said. "She needs to get that shoulder seen to.

"Ducky wasn't there either," Abby contended. "Neither was McGee."

"I'll go," Gibbs said.

"Let me," Tony spoke up. Gibbs looked at him questioningly. "Please, boss?" he asked. Gibbs thought about how Ziva and Tony had seemed to have found a sudden closeness and nodded.

"Poor Ziva," Abby said sadly as she watched Tony walk away from the group. "I shouldn't have put those balloons on the floor."

"It's not your fault, Abs," Gibbs said. "Or yours," he said to Palmer who was standing there looking guilty. "The only ones to blame are those bastards who did this to her."

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Ziva locked herself inside a cubicle in the ladies room. Her wounded shoulder felt as though it was being burnt from the inside out but the worst thing was the wave of complete and utter panic that had washed over her. As soon as she had heard the balloon burst, she had thought that she was being shot at. Her mind had drifted back to the warehouse where she had been held, where she had been helpless as the terrorists had killed Aharon and her other comrades, where they had beat and shot her. Ziva could almost hear their vicious taunts and their laughter once again. She could almost feel one of the men on top of her, taking what power and dignity that she had left. Tears streamed down her face and she was powerless to stop them. Her heart was racing and she struggled desperately to breathe.

"Ziva," she heard Tony say from outside the bathroom door. He had been careful not to knock in case the sound frightened her again. "Ziva, can I come in?" Ziva didn't reply. She couldn't talk. She could barely breathe. All she could seem to do in that moment was cry helplessly. "I'm coming in," Tony warned her, before he slowly opened the door and found himself inside the ladies' bathroom. "Wow, it's much nicer in here. Wanna swap?" Tony asked, trying to lighten the mood. He gave this up when he heard Ziva crying from inside one of the cubicles. The sound broke his heart.

"Hey," he said, sweetly. "Open the door, Ziva. It's okay. It's nothing to be embarrassed about." Ziva tried desperately to concentrate on Tony's voice and where she was in the present instead of thinking about where she had been held but it seemed impossible.

"Tony," she managed to stammer, panicked. "I-" a sob escaped her before she could tell him that she was fine.

"It's okay," Tony said comfortingly. "Open the door. It's just me." Ziva managed to do as Tony had said. She forced the door open and stepped into Tony's waiting arms. Tony was shocked by how much Ziva was shaking. "Slow, deep breaths," he said softly as he tried to calm her. Being held in his strong, gentle arms seemed to calm Ziva a little. She managed to get some air into her lungs but she was still unable to stop crying. Tony continued to hold her.

After what felt like an eternity to Ziva, her breathing returned to its normal rhythm and her racing pulse slowed again.

"That's better," Tony said as he ran his fingers through her hair. Ziva wiped her eyes and lifted her head from Tony's strong chest, looking him in the eye.

"This isn't just going to go away," she said with realization. Tony shook his head.

"Not on its own," he replied, sympathetically. "These things take time." Ziva looked angry.

"I thought that if I was strong enough I could just put this behind me," she whispered, looking down, ashamed.

"Ziva, you're the strongest person I know," Tony said truthfully. "Nobody would come though what you've come through unscathed. Let us help you. It doesn't mean that you're not strong." Ziva thought about what Tony had said. As much as she was used to shutting people out, part of her knew that Tony was right. This time she needed people. She nodded slightly. "Good," Tony said, relived that he had got through to her. Ziva took a shaky breath and Tony pulled her into a hug again, kissing her on the forehead this time. She didn't protest. "Are you ready to go back out there?" he asked her.

"No," Ziva admitted. "But I will."

Tony opened the door to the ladies' bathroom and was met by a surprised look from a woman who was on the other side. The look on the woman's face made Ziva giggle a little, and that made Tony smile.

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When they exited the ladies' room, Tony and Ziva were met by Gibbs, who was waiting for them down the hall. Without saying anything, Gibbs rested his hand on Ziva's back supportively and led her to the elevator. Tony followed.

"Where are we going?" Ziva asked as the elevator doors closed.

"Ducky's gonna sew your shoulder wound back up," Gibbs said. Ziva looked down at her blood stained shirt. She had almost forgotten about the ripped out stitches. "And then you're gonna take some more pain medication and lie down." Ziva opened her mouth to tell Gibbs that she didn't need to lie down but the look on Gibbs' face told her that arguing would be a waste of time.

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While Ducky was tending to Ziva, Abby made her way down to autopsy holding one of her shirts for Ziva to change into in one hand, and a piece of cake in the other.

"What are you doing out here?" she asked Palmer, who was standing outside the autopsy room doors looking guilty.

"I thought I'd stay out of the way in case I mess something else up," Palmer admitted. Abby looked sympathetic.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you," she said genuinely. "I was worried about Ziva. It wasn't your fault. Accidents happen."

"They happen too often when I'm around," Palmer replied.

"They happen to everyone," Abby said. "That's one of the reasons that I came down here. " She extended her arm, holding the piece of cake, to him. "A peace offering," she said. Palmer gave her a little smile.

"Thanks," he said, accepting the cake.

"Don't beat yourself up, Jimmy," Abby said, heading into autopsy.

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"What's the verdict, Ducky?" Abby asked as she walked over to where Ducky had just finished stitching Ziva's surgical wound on her shoulder back together. Gibbs and Tony stood nearby, hovering protectively.

"She's going to be just fine," Ducky replied as he covered the wound with an adhesive bandage. "All done, my dear."

"Thank you, Ducky," Ziva said quietly, but gratefully.

Abby handed the shirt to Ziva, who slipped it on over the singlet that she was was a black fitted t-shirt with a red skull on it.

"You look fantastic," Abby said with a smile.

"What now?" Ziva asked Gibbs. She knew that she wouldn't be allowed to work, and she hoped that Gibbs knew that she wasn't ready to be alone just yet.

"Go with Abby," Gibbs replied. "I'll be down there soon." Ziva nodded and allowed Abby to lead her back to the elevator and down to her lab.

"What is it, Duck?" Gibbs asked Ducky who looked as though he had something to say. Tony listened in keenly.

"Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, I'd say," Ducky replied. "It's certainly not surprising given everything that the poor girl's been through. It's where-"

"Yeah, I know what it is, Duck," Gibbs said, sounding worried. "I've seen it in enough soldiers."

"I'm not an authority on PTSD, Jethro, but I'd keep a close eye on her." Gibbs nodded solemnly and Tony followed him back to the elevators.

"Go back up and help McGee on the current case file," Gibbs said to Tony as he stepped out into Abby's lab.

"But, boss-" Tony protested.

"But, nothing, Dinozzo. Do as I say." Tony nodded reluctantly and closed the elevator doors.

Gibbs walked through Abby's lab to where Abby had placed an inflatable mattress, some blankets and Bert the farting hippo in a corner. Ziva was sitting on the mattress, looking exhausted and distracted but trying to listen to Abby who was talking to her, animatedly. Gibbs took a bottle of water out of Abby's fridge and pulled Ziva's pain pills from his pocket. He handed both items to her. This time Ziva didn't protest. She took the pills willingly, craving unconsciousness. This worried Gibbs more. At least before, when she had fought him she had displayed her trademark tenacity. This time Ziva looked defeated. Gibbs sat down on the ground beside the mattress.

"Lie down and get some rest," he said to her, softly. Ziva nodded and did as she was told.

"Do you sleep better with music, Ziva?" Abby asked, trying to help. "I can play some of my music for you; Plastic Death, Brain Matter, Kidney Thieves or-"

"No music, Abby," Gibbs warned her. He turned his attention back to Ziva who was staring vacantly at the ceiling.

"Close your eyes," Gibbs said gently. "You're safe here. Nothing's gonna happen to you." Ziva took a deep, shaky breath, wondering if Gibbs knew how much courage it took for her to close her eyes. She couldn't bring herself to do it. Gibbs took Ziva's hand in his, protectively, and gave it a squeeze. Ziva managed to close her eyes, not feeling so alone anymore, and within a few minutes the drugs started to take affect and she had fallen asleep.

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"How is she?" Tony asked urgently as Gibbs went back to his desk, half an hour later.

"She's asleep," Gibbs replied, still visibly disturbed by Ziva's defeated demeanour.

"Where's she gonna stay tonight, boss?" Tony asked.

"I don't know, Dinozzo," Gibbs snapped. "I'm more concerned for her immediate wellbeing. We've only been back in the country for a few hours." He sensed that Tony had something to tell him. "Why?" he asked.

"I thought I'd do some looking around," Tony started. "And there's an apartment in my building, three doors down from where I am, that's for lease. If Ziva wants it, she can still have her independence but I'm- I mean, there's a special agent just down the hall." Gibbs paused for a moment.

"That's good work, Dinozzo," he finally said. "Organize the lease."

_- Thoughts? _


	9. But When It Is Quiet

Thank you so much for the feedback that you guys have been giving me. You have no idea how much I appreciate it and how much it motivates me. I'm so glad that you're enjoying this fic! Please review for me.

**Chapter 9 – But When It Is Quiet **

By 7pm that night, most of the NCIS staff had left work, however, Ziva was still fast sleep on the mattress in Abby's lab.

"How is she?" Gibbs asked as he stepped out of the elevator. He had just been in a meeting with Vance where he had reluctantly promised to attend the presentation of his Congressional Gold Medal in the morning.

"No change," Tony replied. He had been sitting a few feet from Ziva, watching her sleep and thinking about how close they had come to losing her forever. Gibbs couldn't help but notice that Tony seemed to have matured in the days since Rivkin's death. He seemed older and wiser. Gibbs fought away a yawn, feeling the effects of being awake for nearly twenty hours straight due to the time differences between Africa and America, and sat down beside Tony.

"I don't want to wake her," Tony admitted. "Look how peaceful she looks." Gibbs nodded in agreement; Ziva seemed so calm and carefree while she was asleep. Suddenly the elevator doors opened and Abby and McGee stepped out.

"I thought you two went home," Gibbs said as Abby and McGee approached them, holding shopping bags.

"It didn't feel right to go home just yet," McGee said.

"We've been shopping for Ziva," Abby added, placing some of the bags on the ground in front of Gibbs and Tony. "Clothes, groceries and other practical items," she said proudly. Gibbs looked surprised. He had been so busy worrying about Ziva's immediate wellbeing that he had forgotten that she had nothing.

"That's very kind of you, Abby, McGee," Gibbs said gratefully.

"See, there are some things that men just don't think of," Abby replied.

"Let me guess," Tony said, peeking into one of the bags of clothes. "Studded dog collars and chains?"

"I wish, but no," Abby replied. "Everything there looks like something that Ziva would have picked herself." As if she had heard her own name, Ziva suddenly stirred and opened her eyes. She recognized her surroundings as Abby's lab. In the first moments of waking, Ziva was still groggy. She still looked calm and in control, like the Ziva that they used to know, and then the reality of her situation and what she had recently been through hit her and her face hardened and that wounded look returned to her eyes. It was difficult for her colleagues to watch.

"Hey there, sleepy head," Tony said, despite this. Ziva sat up, yawning.

"How long have I been asleep?" Ziva asked, looking around and realizing that it was night-time.

"It doesn't matter," Gibbs replied. "The important thing is that you got some rest."

"We bought you some things," Abby said, pointing to the bags.

"And you have an apartment," Tony added.

Ziva looked at the bags, seeing what Abby had carefully selected for her and her eyes briefly filled with tears. The fact that her colleagues were all sitting by her side and had gone to this much trouble to get her back on her feet was more than had been done for her before and more than she had expected. She blinked the tears away before they could notice.

"Thank you," she said in a quiet voice. "I will repay you all, somehow."

"Don't worry about it. You'd do it for us," Gibbs said.

"Just don't leave us again," Abby said. "Ever."

"That, I can promise you," Ziva said with assurance.

"Let's get you home, neighbour," Tony said with a smile.

"Neighbour?" Ziva asked confused.

"You're living three apartments away from Tony now," McGee informed her. "Good luck with that!" Ziva actually felt comforted by the idea. She allowed McGee to help her to stand up.

"Am I doing the right thing giving this to you?" Gibbs asked, taking a gun out of his holster. Ziva nodded, relieved to have her own weapon again. "It's brand new, never fired," Gibbs said. "And I don't expect it to be for a while." Ziva nodded, taking the gun and the holster from Gibbs. He then handed her a badge. "Although you're not back on duty yet, welcome back, Special Agent David." Ziva smiled at her new title. She liked the sound of it.

"I programmed a new PDA for you," McGee said, handing it to her. "And, your new cell phone. All our numbers are in there."

"Thank you," Ziva said, taking them, a little overwhelmed. "Thank you to all of you."

"Now go home and get some rest," Gibbs said, patting her on the back as Tony and Abby carried Ziva's new things to Tony's car.

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"The apartment's fully furnished, so you don't have to worry about all that boring furniture shopping," Tony said as he parked at the apartment block. Ziva managed a little smile as she undid her seatbelt. Tony handed her the keys to the trunk of the car.

"I just have to make a quick phone call," he said. Ziva nodded and got out of the car. Tony quickly dialled Rachel, the woman who he had been recently seeing. He watched Ziva in the side mirror of the car, unloading her new possessions from the trunk. He didn't want her to injure herself but he knew how important it was to her to retain some independence. He didn't want to treat her as though she was weaker than he was. He knew that she wasn't.

"Hello sexy," Rachel said flirtatiously as she answered the phone. "Are we still on for tonight?"

"Actually, no, I'm sorry," Tony said, sincerely. "Look, Rachel, we've had a great time together but…"

"You don't want something serious," she finished his sentence for him.

"Exactly," Tony replied, although it wasn't true. "Listen, you're a great girl and I'm sure there's someone out there for you…"

"It's just not you," Rachel said, sounding disappointed.

"I'm sorry," Tony said. Rachel hung up the phone. Tony sighed and got out of the car.

"Is everything alright?" Ziva asked him. Tony was surprised that she even thought to ask, given what she had been through herself.

"Everything's fine," Tony said. "He picked up one of the bags of groceries. "Ooh what do we have here?" he asked. "Spaghetti, mushrooms, tomatoes. Add a few more secret ingredients and you have the Dinozzo family special. You will never taste Italian food that measures up, ever again." Ziva smiled at Tony, but the look that had been in her eye ever since her rescue remained there.

"You don't have to do this, Tony," she said to him.

"Do what?" Tony asked, looking through the grocery items.

"Babysit me," Ziva said. "I will be fine on my own if you want to go and… do whatever it is that you do at night."

"Well, tonight it's just me and the remote control so I'd be grateful for the company," he said. "I have nothing to do; you've had a long day. Let me cook you dinner." Ziva looked sceptical.

"You've never offered to cook for me before," she said.

"Yeah well, things change," Tony said. "People change." Ziva nodded, agreeing with him as they took the bags up to her new apartment.

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Tony refused to let Ziva help him cook dinner, telling her that the secrets of the Dinozzo family recipe would not be revealed to anybody. Eventually Ziva gave up trying to help and ran a bath with Epson salts in a bid to relax further and heal her injured body faster. As much as she wasn't ready to admit it, she was glad that Tony was in her apartment. She really hadn't wanted to be left alone.

When she had finished her bath, Ziva went into the small, yet tasteful, dining room wearing a pair of lounge pyjamas that Abby had bought for her. Her hair was wet and curly and hung loosely around her face. She wasn't as concerned with how Tony would react to her bruising; he had already seen it, it was more about how she would react when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Her reflection was a constant reminder of what they had done to her so she used her hair as a shield whenever possible.

"You look nice," Tony said to her as he poured them two glasses of water. There was no sarcasm or flirtatiousness in his tone.

"I am feeling a lot better," Ziva said, taking a seat.

"I'm glad," Tony said. "_Bon Appétit." _

_"I thought Italian was your specialty," Ziva said, light-heartedly. _

_"I'm a man of many talents, Ziva David," Tony said with a smile. "To new neighbours," he said, raising his glass. _

_"To new neighbours," Ziva repeated, clicking her glass against his. _

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Tony reluctantly allowed Ziva to help him clean up after they had finished eating the delicious meal that Tony had prepared and as she helped him, Tony noticed that she was holding her left arm differently.

"You're in pain," he said to her.

"It's not so bad," Ziva replied, lying.

"Not to go all Gibbs on you but you're overdue for your pain medication, not to mention all the other meds to stop infection." Ziva sighed and took a bottle of water over to the table where she had placed her medication.

"The pills will make me tired. I feel like all I've done today is sleep," she said.

"Rubbish," Tony replied. "You got a new apartment, sampled the famous Dinozzo family special, scored a heap of new things and reunited the NCIS family." Ziva smiled a little and swallowed the cocktail of tablets which Doctor Schwartz had prescribed her back on the USS Lincoln and after a few minutes of small talk with Tony, she began to look visibly tired.

"I should let you get some sleep," Tony said. Ziva nodded, relishing the thought of sleeping in a proper bed again. "I can take the couch tonight," Tony offered. "I mean, it's a safe building but you know, since it's your first night here and all…" his voice trailed off. He wasn't used to showing concern for Ziva.

"I'll be okay," Ziva promised him. Truthfully, part of her wanted him to stay but the other part of her wanted to prove to herself that she could do this on her own. Tony nodded.

"Well, I'm just three doors away if you need anything," Tony said, putting on his jacket.

"Thank you, Tony," Ziva said, before he left. "For everything." Tony gave her a kind smile.

"I'm really glad that you're back," he said to her.

"As am I," Ziva added. "Goodnight."

"Night," Tony replied. He closed the door quietly behind him and Ziva found herself staring around the new, tidy apartment. She yawned once again and went into the bedroom to see that the sheets and blanket that Abby had bought were already on the bed. Tony must have made the bed up while she was in the bath, she thought to herself. Grateful for this, Ziva crawled into bed and placed her new gun under her pillow.

_She was back there again. She had been recaptured. She wouldn't be so lucky this time. They had her and they beat her even more viciously than they had before, doing everything in their power to break her down. Suddenly she was in the cramped room that the most sinister of all the men had dragged her to. She fought with everything that she had in her but he was too strong for her, holding her arms down, pinning her legs down with his. Her stomach churned as she felt his hot breath against her face._

Suddenly Ziva sat up, gasping for air. She pulled out the gun and pointed it into the darkness. Her heart was pounding and her lungs felt as though they were being squeezed shut. She was covered in sweat and it took her a few moments to realize that she hadn't been recaptured at all. It was all a horrible nightmare. Ziva made her way to the light switch and turned it on, still clutching the gun. Her eyes adjusted to the light and she realized that she was in no immediate danger, yet her body didn't seem to get the message. She was still trembling and struggling to breathe, her heart pounding like a jack hammer in her chest. She went into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water, but as she picked it up, her trembling hand involuntarily let it go and it smashed, sending shards of glass flying everywhere.

"Shit!" Ziva shouted in frustration, as angry and frightened tears began streaming down her face. She thought back to how Tony had managed to help calm her when she had panicked earlier and as much as she wished that she didn't, she knew that she needed his help again. Ziva, still clutching the gun, carefully exited her apartment, shaking the entire time, and made her way to Tony's front door. She knocked, feeling vulnerable standing in the silent and empty hallway. After about a minute the door opened and Tony, half asleep, emerged.

"Hey," he said, worried and seeming to wake up immediately. "What is it?" he asked. He gently pulled Ziva inside and closed the door behind her, taking her gun out of her trembling hand and placing it on a nearby cabinet. He understood that she was panicking as she had been earlier so he didn't expect her to say anything. Instead he pulled her close to him, holding her tightly in his arms, hoping that this would calm her. "Stay here for the rest of the night," he whispered. "You're gonna be okay."

_- Thoughts _


	10. Someone's Little Girl Was Taken

_Hey there. Thank you for the feedback that you've been giving me. I'm going to try and keep updating this fic regularly, 'cos I know as a reader, I hate waiting ages between updates. But I do have my major scary final year law degree exams coming up and for the next week or so I have to study and catch up in a big way *panics* (WHY can't I just write fanfic for a living??) I'm basically running on caffeine alone at the moment. So if I don't update as regularly, that's why. But hopefully you won't notice any difference in update times 'cos I love writing this fic and will try and make time for it. Thanks again for the feedback. You guys are awesome. _

_- Katie _

**Chapter 10- Someone's Little Girl Was Taken From the World Tonight **

"What happened?" Tony asked Ziva, with concern, wondering what had triggered this fresh wave of panic in her. Her whole body was trembling.

"A dream," she managed to stammer. Ziva hated how weak she thought she sounded. While she had experienced bad dreams before, she had never reacted like this. Then again, she had never had a dream so real. The logical side of her knew that it wasn't real, and yet her body was reacting as if it was. She felt utterly helpless.

"A flashback?" Tony asked as Ziva stepped back and wiped her eyes with her hand. Ziva shook her head, trying desperately to stop crying, but was unable to do so. Tony led her over to his plush couch and sat her down. He sat down beside her and placed an arm around her.

"No, it was…" Ziva started, but another sob escaped her before she could continue again. Tony moved his hand up and down her back, soothingly. "They caught me again," she finally managed to say. "And they were crueller this time."

"God, Ziva. I'm sorry" Tony said, sympathetically. He could only imagine what she was feeling.

"It's so stupid!" Ziva said, through tears, angry at herself. "It was only a dream… But I can feel them," she continued, shaking. "All around me, I can feel them watching me, preying on me, ready to take me again. Even when I'm awake."

"That's not gonna happen," Tony promised her. "They're all dead, remember?" Ziva shook her head.

"Not all of them," she replied. "That was just one cell. Those men were just doing the legwork. They were not behind the operation."

"I'm sure that Mossad will take care of the rest of them," Tony said. Ziva knew that he was probably right. Mossad would want revenge for the lives lost. Those behind that cell were probably being hunted down already. "You're safe here," Tony reassured her. "Africa's a long way away. You're in Washington now. You work with some of the best agents around, if I do say so myself. No one's gonna let anything happen to you. Plus, you can defend yourself. Remember when you took on those six guys not so long ago?" Ziva took a shaky breath and shook her head.

"I used to be able to defend myself," she replied quietly. "I won every fight. But then they caught me and I couldn't do a thing to save myself." It was only then that Tony realized just how much Ziva's confidence in herself has been damaged. No, not damaged, shattered. It seemed as though those men had taken everything from her.

"I wish I knew how to help you," Tony said sadly, feeling hopeless. Ziva looked up at him, surprised.

"Tony, you have helped me," she said, surprised that he didn't realize this.

"It doesn't feel like enough," Tony replied. Ziva wiped her eyes, still shaking but feeling herself beginning to calm. She took his hand in hers for a moment and squeezed it, communicating what she wasn't used to saying.

"Do you want to try and go back to sleep?" Tony asked. Ziva shook her head.

"No," she replied, trying to suppress a yawn. She was obviously still very tired. Tony nodded, understanding. "I should let you go back to sleep though," Ziva said as she settled. "I am sorry for waking you." She started to stand up. Tony gently took her hand, indicating for her to sit back down. Ziva did so.

"Don't be ridiculous," he said. "Stay here. We'll watch a movie or something."

"That sounds like a good idea," Ziva said, gratefully, suppressing another yawn.

"Alright then" Tony said enthusiastically as he went over and opened the cabinet containing his extensive DVD collection. "What are you in the mood for?" he asked. "Personally I'm in the mood for some Jack Nicholson. But then again, I always am. There's no such thing as too much Jack." There was no response. "Ziva?" he asked, turning back to her. Despite her willingness not to, Ziva had fallen asleep slumped on the couch. Her medication had overpowered her fragile body. Tony popped 'About Schmidt' into the DVD player and sat next to Ziva on the couch. He noticed that she was still trembling, even in her sleep. Just in case it was the cold and not the fear that was doing that to her, Tony went and pulled a blanket from a closet and gently draped it over Ziva as she slept. He didn't want to fall asleep in case she had another nightmare so he sat back on the comfortable couch and watched the movie, keeping an eye on Ziva the entire time.

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Six hours later, and after his third movie of the night, Tony was still awake and was dressed and making some coffee, knowing that he would need it to get through the day. He heard Ziva murmur something in Hebrew from the couch as she stirred awake.

"Morning," Tony called from the kitchen. Ziva slowly sat up, looking confused.

"I can't believe that I fell back asleep," she said yawning.

"You needed the rest," Tony said as he poured the coffee into his Kill Bill 1 and Kill Bill 2 mugs and took them over to the couch.

"Did you get some sleep?" Ziva asked him.

"Yeah," Tony said, lying. His tired expression convinced Ziva otherwise as he handed a mug to her.

"Thank you," Ziva said gratefully. "Tony, I don't mean to be such a burdon. I am sorry," she said, feeling guilty.

"I thought we'd been through this," Tony said wearily as he sipped his coffee. "You're not a burdon."

"I am just not used to having to rely on other people," Ziva said quietly.

"Well maybe it's about time that changed," Tony said. They sat in silence for a few moments. "Are you going to come into NCIS today?" he asked. Ziva thought back to the nightmare that she'd had and the events of the day before and shook her head. She didn't want to be around talk of death and terror cells but most of all she was worried that there would be a repeat of the balloon incident. She didn't want to panic and embarrass herself in front of her colleagues again upon being surprised by some sudden noise while she still felt so vulnerable. Ziva shook her head.

"I think that I need to rest today." she said to Tony. This immediately struck Tony as odd. Ziva would usually never admit such a thing, no matter what state she was in.

"Are you in pain?" Tony asked, concerned. Ziva nodded. It wasn't a complete lie. "Well do you want me to stay with you?" he asked. Ziva did, but she didn't want to admit to it. She shook her head.

"I will be fine," she promised, sounding stronger than she felt. Tony checked his watch and finished off his coffee.

"Okay then," he said, sounding unsure. "Do you want to stay here for the day? I can recommend some movies for you?" Ziva shook her head.

"No, it's alright," she said. "I will go to my apartment. Do you have any books?"

"Uh…" Tony said, sounding unsure. He went over to the cabinet and pulled out a thick hardback book. "This is a personal favourite," he said, as he handed it to Ziva. Ziva read the title and forced herself to laugh for Tony's benefit. '1000 Movies to See Before You Die,' it was titled.

"Well, I imagine that this will keep me busy for most of the day," she said, trying to lighten the mood. She looked up at Tony who she could tell was worried about leaving her home alone for the day. "Tony, I will be fine," she assured him. "Now go to work before Gibbs gets mad at you." Tony nodded and they stood up. Ziva grabbed her gun on the way out and Tony led her back to her apartment and followed her inside. He noticed that Ziva's hands were still trembling as she placed the book and her gun on the counter.

"I'll call you during the day and see how you're going," Tony said.

"It is not necessary," Ziva tried to convince him.

"Yeah, well it will make me feel better," Tony said. "Indulge me." Ziva sighed and gave Tony a nod.

"I'll see you later," she said.

"Bye," Tony replied. He wanted to hug her once more before he left, to try and stop her shaking completely but he knew how important it was for her to appear independent. He gave her a small smile as he left her apartment instead.

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That same morning, Gibbs reluctantly turned up at NCIS earlier than usual, knowing that he would have to receive his Congressional Gold Medal with a full media circus. He had declined Vance's request to wear a suit for the occasion and was instead clothed in his usual attire. Suddenly his cell phone in his jacket pocket rang. Gibbs squinted to see the number calling him. He didn't recognize it.

"Yeah, Gibbs," he said, answering the phone.

"Shalom, Agent Gibbs," a familiar voice said to him.

"Eli," Gibbs said cordially. "How did you get this number?"

"Never mind that," Eli replied. "I hear that you have my daughter."

"I don't _have_ her," Gibbs said, resenting the term that Eli had used. "She's not a piece of property. Ziva chose to return to NCIS."

"Without informing me," Eli said, judgmentally. "I wonder how she came to that decision so soon, Agent Gibbs." Gibbs knew what Eli was hinting at.

"Ziva is capable of making her own decisions," Gibbs replied.

"Not at the moment, she is not," Eli said, raising his voice. "She has been captured and tortured by those animals. She is in no state to decide her future. She needs to be at home with her family."

"So you can use her again, Eli?" Gibbs contended, feeling protective of his agent. "And how would you know what state she's in? Ziva _is_ at home, with her family. It's her decision to make, not mine and not yours." Gibbs hung up the phone before Eli could respond to this. He briefly wondered if he was being too harsh on Ziva's father but his gut told him that if Ziva had gone back to Israel, she wouldn't be allowed to fully recover from what she had been though. Gibbs greeted McGee and sat down at his desk as Tony exited the elevator.

"Morning, boss, morning, Probie," Tony said.

"Where's Ziva?" McGee asked.

"I was about to ask the same thing," Gibbs said harshly.

"It's nice to see you too," Tony said. "She didn't feel up to coming in today."

"So you left her alone?" McGee asked, surprised. Gibbs just glared at Tony, waiting for an answer.

"She had a really rough night, boss. A nightmare and everything. She really didn't look up to coming in today. She wanted to be alone."

"All the more reason not to have left her alone, Dinozzo" Gibbs said, standing up. "Sit," he said to Tony who did as he was told, taking a seat at his desk. "McGee, you're in charge for the day," Gibbs said. McGee smiled as Gibbs stepped into the elevator.

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Back at her new apartment, Ziva sat on the couch, clutching her gun in silence. Her hands were trembling and every so often a few frightened tears would spill from her eyes. She had barely been able to hold herself together in front of Tony that morning and now she felt as though she was completely falling apart. Every noise from outside made her jump and it didn't matter whether she kept her eyes opened or closed, she could see those men everywhere, behind every corner, waiting to grab her again. Ziva told herself over and over again to be reasonable, to realize that those men were dead and that she was safe but nothing seemed to calm her. Suddenly there was a knock at the door, piercing the silence and Ziva gasped loudly, frightened.

"It's Gibbs, Ziva," she heard him say from outside. He had heard her gasp. Ziva frantically wiped the tears away with her hand and took a deep, shaky breath, willing herself to go back to how she used to be. It was futile. Ziva slowly walked over to the door and checked that it was in fact Gibbs before she opened it.

Gibbs looked at her sympathetically, yet not pitifully, which Ziva was grateful for. She was so relieved to see him. Gibbs took a step towards Ziva and pulled her into a hug. Ziva was unable to stop the sobs that escaped her as Gibbs held her in a way that her father never had.

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Tony fought off a yawn as he, McGee and the rest of the NCIS team sat around while the Congressional Gold Medal ceremony was taking place.

"… And for risking his own life to protect the freedom of the United States of America," the Congressman continued, "I award the Congressional Gold Medal to NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs."

"Do you think Vance knows?" McGee asked Tony as everybody applauded. Tony shook his head as everybody looked around, confused. There was no sign of Gibbs.

"I'm gonna shoot him," Vance said to his secretary, through his false smile, as he applauded.

_- Thoughts?_


	11. Trouble is the Only Way Down

Hey there, I'm back! It's been a while between updates because exams were taking over my life. Then I needed some to just rest and recover from that. But now I'm back at class (booooo!) and back with an update for you. Thanks so much for the reviews that you've been giving me and please keep them coming. You guys are awesome.

**Chapter 11- Trouble Is The Only Way Down.  
**

After he had helped her over to the couch, Gibbs found Ziva's pain medication, poured her a glass of water and took them over to her. As soon as Ziva saw the pills she shook her head defiantly.

"No," she stammered.

"Now's not the time to be playing the hero, Ziva," Gibbs replied as he sat down beside her. Ziva shook her head again. Gibbs sighed. "Don't try to convince me that you're not in pain. I know exactly what a bullet to the shoulder feels like." Ziva closed her eyes for a moment. _Ari._

"I can handle the pain," she stammered, opening her eyes again, "if it means that I can stay awake."

"Tony said that you had a nightmare," Gibbs said softly, looking at her, concerned. Ziva looked away uncomfortably. "Do you wanna talk about it?" Ziva shook her head again. Gibbs noticed that she was clenching her fists as she said this. He knew that she would need some kind of professional help sooner or later. "We'll compromise," Gibbs said.

"You don't compromise," Ziva replied.

"I'm making an exception," Gibbs said. "You take the pills and I won't let you fall asleep."

"Promise?" Ziva asked, unable to ignore the physical pain that she was in.

"I give my word," Gibbs replied. Ziva accepted the two tablets and the water from Gibbs and swallowed them. She leaned back on the couch, trying to make herself comfortable.

"Don't you have to work or something?" she asked Gibbs.

"Nope," Gibbs replied, wondering briefly what Vance was doing. Ziva closed her eyes, waiting for the medication to kick in and for her battered body to stop aching.

"Did you ever think of being anything else?" she asked Gibbs, keeping her eyes closed and trying to relax.

"Than what?" Gibbs replied.

"Than a Marine."

"No," Gibbs replied honestly. "Did you ever think of not joining Mossad?"

"No," Ziva replied. "I did not join Mossad against my will but I was brought up to want this. I fired my first gun when I was six years old. I was throwing knives when I was seven."

"I'm guessing that no one messed with you on the playground," Gibbs said with a little smile.

"True," Ziva said, smiling back.

"Are you thinking of a career change?" Gibbs asked.

"No," Ziva replied. "I just wonder sometimes what my life would have been like if I'd chosen a different path. I go to work and I kill people or capture people… or they capture me. Other people go to work and they teach or heal or play with children. If I hadn't been brought up to want to join Mossad would I be married? Would I have children? Would I have joined Mossad anyway? Would I still be where I am now?"

"I don't know," Gibbs said quietly, thinking about what Ziva had said.

"It's alright, Gibbs," Ziva said, turning to him. "I don't expect answers. I am just rambling. I think it's the medication."

"_Has she talked yet?"_

"_Not yet."_

"_Why not!? Do you not know how to follow simple orders!?"_

"_We have done everything that you told us to do but she has not spoken."_

"_Is this true, Hashim?" _

"_It is true. She will not talk. If we keep beating her, she will die."_

"_There is one more thing that you can do, and it will not kill her. You must violate her and turn her into a traitor. Do you understand?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Hashim?"_

"_Yes, I understand."_

"_Than do it!" _

"Ziva?" Gibbs asked. He waved his hand in front of Ziva's face. She appeared to be transfixed by something that he could not see. "Ziva," Gibbs said again, louder this time. The colour appeared to have drained from her face.

Ziva couldn't believe that she was only just remembering it now. Slumped in the chair, beaten and deprived of food and water, she had not had the strength to lift her head as she came out of unconsciousness. Only partially conscious, she had heard a muffled voice talking through a speakerphone from somewhere outside the room, to the men who were holding her captive. A voice that she knew.

"It can't be…" Ziva said, shuddering at the thought that it could be true. She knew deep down that she had not mistaken what she had heard. She thought back to when she had spoken to him last.

"_Ziva… always full of fire."_

"What?" Gibbs asked, concerned, trying to understand what Ziva was trying to figure out. Ziva finally gave Gibbs her attention.

"He was behind it," she said, with disbelief. "He was behind all of it."

"Who?" Gibbs asked.

"Amit Hadar," Ziva answered. "You met him in Israel." Gibbs nodded.

"I remember," he said. "Are you telling me that your father's right hand man had you captured?" Ziva nodded, looking sickened by the thought.

"I heard him," she explained. "For some reason I couldn't remember but… I was barely conscious and those men were talking to him on the phone… It was on speaker. It was him. I could hear him giving them orders… telling them to…" Ziva couldn't say it. The thought made her ill.

"Why would an Israeli turn on his own?" Gibbs asked.

"Do you doubt me?" Ziva asked, defensively. "I assure you that it was him."

"I know," Gibbs reassured her. "I just don't understand the logic."

"Hadar was either following orders from my father," Ziva's voice trailed off. "Or my father's life is in danger… and so is mine," she said quietly. Gibbs could tell which scenario Ziva thought it was.

"You think he's planning to have you and your father killed?" he asked, his anger at Hadar building by the second.

"He must be planning something," Ziva replied. "My father wouldn't… he wouldn't need to have me tortured if he wanted information on NCIS. NCIS and Mossad are sister agencies. We are on the same side. We share information all the time so I would give him the information that he wanted."

"And if Hadar asked you for information?" Gibbs asked.

"I do not answer to him," Ziva replied. "I would tell him that I answer only to my father. I don't understand why he would go behind my father's back… why he would…" her voice trailed off as she remembered what she had overheard.

"_You must violate her and turn her into a traitor. Do you understand?"_

"He wanted me to betray NCIS," Ziva explained to Gibbs. "His exact words were _'you must violate her and turn her into a traitor.'_ He must have been trying to turn me against my father and against America. Gibbs felt anger course through his veins as he thought about how Ziva had been betrayed so brutally. At that moment he wanted to hunt Hadar down more than anything.

"If he was trying to alienate you from Israel and America, he must have seen you as a threat," Gibbs said.

"I am a David," Ziva said. "I had just returned as a Mossad field Officer. He must have thought that I was a threat to him…"

"To him becoming Director of Mossad," Gibbs said, finishing Ziva's sentence.

"… When he had my father killed," Ziva replied. "And none of us saw that there was a traiter in our midst."

"Have you heard from Hadar at all since you've been back in the US?" Gibbs asked Ziva urgently, walking to the door and grabbing his jacket.

"No, I haven't," Ziva said.

"You got away and you weren't supposed to," Gibbs said, his gut telling him that the situation was dire. "He's hunting you down. And he probably has a plan in motion to have your father assassinated"

Ziva felt literally paralysed by fear and she hated it. She shook her head.

"Maybe I got it wrong," she stammered.

"Ziva," Gibbs said, looking into her eyes. "You know that you didn't." Ziva nodded. "Now get changed and grab some things. This place is leased in your name. We need to go to NCIS and you need to tell Vance everything you know so that we can protect your father. Then we need to get you into some kind of safe house until we catch Hadar. We need to act now." Despite how much she was trying to hide it, Gibbs could see that Ziva was scared. She knew the kind of training that Hadar had and just what he was capable of. Gibbs went back over to Ziva, who was still seated on the couch and gently placed his hand on the side of her bruised face.

"Nothing is going to happen to you, Ziva," he promised. "I'll keep you safe. But we have to get out of here and back to NCIS now."

**Thoughts?**


	12. I Couldn't Make You See It

Hey there! I'm glad that you're still enjoying this fic. I had this chapter half written and then had classes and have since been very sick. Stupid flu season! Hence the delay. But I've finally got the chapter finished and here it is. I hope you like it. Please review!

**Chapter 12 – I Couldn't Make You See It **

As Gibbs and Ziva rushed to Gibbs' car, Ziva frantically began dialling the numbers of the cell phones that her father used. Neither Eli, nor any of his staff, answered two of the phones.

"Come on, come on," Ziva said anxiously, dialling another number as Gibbs started the car.

"Turn your phone off," Gibbs ordered, worried that Hadar already had the number and was monitoring her movements. Gibbs handed her his cell phone as Ziva switched hers off. Gibbs took Ziva's phone from her and threw it out the window of the moving car where it smashed onto the pavement. Ziva kept dialling on Gibbs' phone willing her father to pick up and for him to believe her.

"Shalom," a familiar voice said on the other end of the line. For a moment Ziva was taken back to the dark room in Somalia before she forced herself to think back to the present and ended the call.

"That was Hadar," she said to Gibbs, her voice sounding more fragile than she wanted it to. Gibbs reached across and took the phone from her, switching it off and throwing it too from the moving vehicle. Another car ran over it, and like the other phone, it was destroyed. Ziva looked slightly surprised by his actions.

"Now we have no phones," she said.

"We're almost there," Gibbs said, overtaking traffic to reach the NCIS building which had now come into view in the distance. Gibbs sped into the parking lot and slammed on the breaks. Then he and Ziva rushed through security and into the NCIS building.

"McGee!" Gibbs shouted as the elevator doors opened. "I need you to find the co-ordinates for this number." Ziva told McGee the number for the cell that Hadar had answered.

"Locating now, boss," McGee said as the computer searched. McGee wondered what was going on. Gibbs looked as though he was on a mission and Ziva wasn't resting like Gibbs kept telling her to do.

"It's inconclusive, Boss," McGee said.

"What the hell does that mean?" Gibbs asked, irritated. McGee was nervous and began talking faster.

"Well, it could be a number of things, Boss. Firstly, and the most likely scenario is that the phone is switched off. Or the owner could be going through a tunnel or could be on a plane or-"

"McGee!" Gibbs shouted, interrupting him.

"I'll stay on it, boss," McGee replied, frantically typing at the computer.

"Where's Dinozzo?" Gibbs asked.

"Conference call in MTAC," McGee said. "I know that you left me in charge but I thought that since it was from Israel and he has more experience there than I do he could-"

"Come on," Gibbs said to Ziva, interrupting McGee. He jogged up the stairs towards MTAC, with Ziva following as fast as she could with her injuries. As Gibbs allowed the machine to scan his eye to gain entrance to MTAC, the doors opened and Vance and Tony emerged.

"I need to talk to you," Gibbs said to Vance.

"And I need to talk to you both," Vance replied. "Follow me." Gibbs and Ziva walked with Vance and Tony to a conference room.

"Director, can I tell Agent David alone?" Tony asked Vance. Vance gave Tony a small nod as Gibbs followed him into the office.

"Tell me what alone?" Ziva asked Tony, confused. Tony looked grim. He didn't want to be the one to say it but he knew that Ziva shouldn't hear it in a purely professional context.

"Ziva," Tony started. He took a deep breath, not knowing how she would take the news. "Your father was just found unconscious at his desk in his office. They did what they could but it was too late. It looks as though he's had a heart attack." Ziva's eyes widened slightly with the shock of what she had just heard. "I'm sorry," Tony said. He knew that Ziva often did not see eye to eye with her father but he also knew that she didn't wish him dead.

"He did not die of natural causes," Ziva said with quiet anger in her voice. Tony looked puzzled. "He was murdered."

"Officer Hadar seemed quite sure that-" Tony started.

"Officer Hadar?" Ziva asked angrily. Tony nodded.

"That man is responsible for this!" Ziva snapped. "He was responsible for my capture! He-" Ziva stopped as she felt Tony's hands gently on her shoulders.

"Slow down," Tony said softly. Ziva could feel that she was about to cry. Instead she swallowed heavily and forced the tears back. She looked into Tony's eyes.

"I remembered. Hadar had me captured. His plan was to kill my father and to succeed him as Director, while I was far away, either dead or labelled a traitor to our country." Ziva felt the fear rise up from within her. "He's after me now."

"He's not gonna find you," Tony said, determined.

"If he finds me, I'll kill him," Ziva replied, sounding more like her old self than she had since her return.

"That's the spirit," Tony said. "Are you ready to talk to Vance?"

"Just a moment," Ziva said, her head spinning with everything that she had learned in the space of a half hour. Tony nodded, sympathetically. He took a step towards Ziva and went to pull her into a hug.

"Tony, no," Ziva said, placing her hands against Tony's muscular chest, knowing that she needed to stay angry. "I cannot fall apart. Not now."

"Okay," Tony replied softly. Ziva closed her eyes and kept her hands on Tony's chest. She gently rested her forehead against his chest as well. She took a few deep breaths to steady herself and for a few seconds everything else faded away.

"I'm ready," she said, lifting her head. Tony nodded at her and gave her a supportive smile before opening the door to Vance's office.

"Officer- I'm sorry, _Agent _David," Vance said, silently reminding himself that Ziva was no longer a Mossad Liaison Officer. "Is this true? About Amit Hadar?"

"Yes," Ziva said with a nod.

"And you are one hundred percent certain of this?"

"Yes," Ziva said again. "Do you have reason to doubt me?" Vance was silent for a moment.

"I know that you're not a liar, Agent David," Vance said. "It's just that I'm about to create one hell of a storm based on what you've told me."

"Well would you just do it already?" Gibbs asked, irritated and unable to stay silent any longer.

"Alright," Vance said, standing up at his desk. "Officer Hadar is temporary Director of Mossad until a replacement can be found. I will go to his second in command and relay Agent David's concerns."

"What? No!" Ziva protested. "You can't do it that way."

"Those are the official channels," Vance replied.

"There are no official channels for something like this, Leon," Gibbs said.

"And you have a better idea?" Vance challenged him.

"I do," Gibbs said. Vance looked sceptical. "Special Agent Cassie Yates has been running an operation out of Jordan," Gibbs continued.

"Wonderful," Ziva said under her breath, remembering their less than friendly relations.

"She's been working near the Israeli border. Give her and her team 48 hours to come up with something and persuade the Israelis that one of their own is responsible for this. If she doesn't succeed, you can pursue it however you like, Leon."

"You're giving me the orders now?" Vance asked.

"It is the best way," Ziva admitted.

"Fine," Vance said, less than impressed. "But you're not to leave the building, do you hear me?" he said to Ziva. "You eat here, you sleep here, you go no where alone. For all we know, Hadar has people after you right now." Ziva nodded. "Agent Dinozzo, take her down to Miss Sciuto's lab so that she can get some rest. You can work from there."

"Sure thing, Director," Tony said.

"Oh and Agent David," Vance said after her. Ziva turned back to him. "I'm sorry for your loss." Ziva nodded in acknowledgement and left with Tony. "The clock's ticking, Agent Gibbs," Vance said. Vance then opened a draw at his desk and took out Gibbs' Congressional Gold Medal. With a glare on his face, he placed it on the desk in front of Gibbs and left the office, to go back to MTAC.

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Tony and Ziva took the elevator down to Abby's lab where Abby was working at a computer. She turned around expecting to see Gibbs with a Caf-Pow in hand.

"Ziva!" she said, surprised, but happy to see her.

"I just need to talk to Abby for a second," Tony whispered to Ziva. "Abs, come over here for a moment," Tony said. Ziva nodded and went over to the mattress that was still set up in the corner of Abby's lab. She sat down on it and appeared to be staring into space, thinking very hard about something. When Tony had finished bringing Abby up to speed, Abby went over to Ziva and sat beside her on the mattress.

"I'm sorry, Ziva," Abby said, gently hugging Ziva.

"Thank you, Abby," Ziva replied, still appearing deep in thought.

"You know, this could be like a slumber party," Abby said.

"A what?" Ziva asked, confused. "A… sleep party?"

"A sleep _over_ party," Abby explained. "Like when you were a kid." Ziva still looked confused. "Aw, you never had one?" Abby asked. "That's terrible." She hugged Ziva again. "Well, tonight you will. We'll get junk food and movies and tell scary stories." Tony shook his head at Abby. "Forget the scary stories," she said. "It'll be fun!"

- _Thoughts?_


	13. Without Letting You Go

Aw thanks for such positive reviews, guys *blushes.* I love that you're still enjoying this and that I'm giving you enough twists and turns. I'm certainly surprising myself with where I'm taking this story! Anyways, here's a new chapter for you. I loved writing it. Please let me know what you think.

**Chapter 13- Without Letting You Go**

While Gibbs was upstairs informing Special Agent Cassie Yates and her team in Jordan of the delicate details of their mission, Abby was walking around her lab excitedly, on a caffeine kick. Tony however, kept his eyes on Ziva, who was still sitting on the mattress in the corner, her mind a million miles away.

"- and McGee can get his projector from his car! Tony, what do you think?" Abby asked him.

"Huh?" Tony asked, turning his attention back to Abby. "Sure. Yeah McGee should bring his projector. Wait- McGoo has a projector? Well, I can't say that I'm all that surprised."

"I'll go ask him," Abby said, rushing over to the elevator.

When Abby had left the lab, Tony went over to where Ziva was and sat down beside her on the mattress.

"Well, you made Abby's day," he said. Ziva smiled faintly. "Looks like you'll be sipping on Caf-Pow and watching illegally downloaded movies all night."

"Are you going to stay for a while?" Ziva asked Tony, hopeful. Tony nodded.

"I'm not going anywhere until they catch that bastard," he promised. "Gibbs isn't either." Ziva looked relieved. "Hey," Tony said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a square gift box. "I hope you don't mind," he said, surprised at how nervous he was. "It's just that everybody here's given you something since you've been back, except the one thing that I noticed you were missing." He handed Ziva the tiny box.

"Tony, you really didn't have to-" Ziva started, but she stopped when she opened the box and saw what was inside. Inside the box was a delicately placed gold Star of David necklace, identical to the one which she had previously worn.

"You never took it off to I figured that it had been taken from you," Tony said. Ziva nodded. "You might not be Mossad anymore but I know how important your country is to you. Your people and their struggle." Ziva nodded again, temporarily overwhelmed by Tony's gesture.

"Thank you," she stammered gratefully, a few stubborn tears falling down her cheeks. She brushed them away quickly. Tony pulled the necklace from the box and gently placed it around Ziva's neck. He fastened the clasp and gently brushed his fingers along the bruises that covered her neck. Ziva took a shaky breath, with tears blurring her vision.

"I'm not supposed to be getting upset yet," she said, wiping more tears away, angry at herself. "Hadar has not been stopped."

"It's okay," Tony said softly. He brushed Ziva's hair behind her ear with his hand so that he could see her face. "If I were in your shoes I'd probably be rocking back and forth in the corner with my thumb in my mouth by now." This made Ziva smile a little. Tony ran his hand up and down her back soothingly.

"We left so much unsaid," Ziva said, clutching the Star of David charm in her hand. Tony knew that Ziva was talking about her father. "In Israel we are very aware of the reality of an early death. Especially in Mossad. I don't know why I waited… why he waited." Ziva looked up at Tony, a little embarrassed. She didn't usually confide in him like this. "I'm sorry," she said. "I should not be telling you this."

"It's alright," Tony said. Ziva winced slightly. "What?" Tony asked. "Your shoulder?" Ziva nodded slightly. "Lie down." Ziva didn't protest this time. She laid down on the mattress.

"I thought injuries were supposed to get better over time," Ziva said impatiently.

"They do," Tony replied. "Providing you give them time. It's been a few days. And you haven't exactly done a whole lot of resting." Ziva sighed, exhausted and frustrated. She brushed a stray strand of hair out of her eyes and caught Tony giving her a tiny smile.

"What?" she asked.

"Your hair's curly again," Tony said. "I haven't seen those curls for a while. I've missed them."

"I don't think I've seen my hair since I've been back," Ziva admitted, wiping the last of her tears from her face. "I've been avoiding mirrors." She saw Tony stifle a yawn. "Tony, you're exhausted," she said.

"No, I'm fine, I…." thinking about yawning made Tony yawn again.

"I know that you had no sleep last night," Ziva said. Tony looked at his watch.

"Maybe I could just grab a five minute power nap." Ziva moved over on the mattress.

"Are you sure?" Tony asked.

"Well, if you prefer to sleep on the cold, hard floor be my guest," Ziva said.

"Tempting, but I'll pass it up this time," Tony joked, lying down on the edge of the mattress, facing Ziva. He was careful to give her plenty of space. Given what she had been through, he was worried about triggering any flashbacks by lying so close to her, but Ziva did not seem at all tense with him there. What she couldn't explain was why she felt calmer with Tony so close to her. Ziva rolled on to her side so that she was facing Tony, who was already falling asleep, and placed her hand on his chest so that she could feel the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. She closed her eyes and willed herself to relax.

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"Jethro!" Ducky said, catching Gibbs just before he stepped into the elevator. He was clutching his medical bag. "Abby's filled me in on the developments. How's Ziva?"

"Pretty shaken up, I'd imagine, Duck," Gibbs replied. "I'm about to go check up on her."

"Would you mind if I take a look at her?" Ducky asked, sounding concerned.

"Get in," Gibbs said, gesturing to the elevator. They both stepped inside. "Are you still worried about a PTSD diagnosis?" Gibbs asked, unable to completely hide the worry in his voice.

"It's too premature for a PTSD diagnosis; however, it is possible that she has developed acute stress disorder, which can lead to PTSD over time. Or she might not have. I know I'm hardly a psychiatrist, but I have seen a lot in my time and I feel as though she should be under some kind of medical supervision." Gibbs nodded.

"And she can trust you, Duck. The people that Ziva knows she can trust are few and far between, and they're all in this building." The elevator doors opened.

"I WAS JUST RESTING WITH MY EYES CLOSED, BOSS!" Tony shouted a little too loudly, waking up suddenly and jumping to his feet when he heard the noise of the elevator doors opening. Gibbs glared at Tony, unimpressed and not needing to say a word to convey his disapproval. He walked over to Ziva who was slowly sitting up. Gibbs sat down next to her on the mattress.

"I just finished talking to Cassie and her team in Jordan," Gibbs said. "They're on it."

"What do we do now?" Ziva asked.

"Now we wait," Gibbs said.

"I was never very good at waiting," Ziva said, nervously.

"That makes two of us," Gibbs replied. The elevator doors opened again and McGee and Abby stepped out.

"We have a projector," Abby announced happily. "And a collection of films now showing in cinemas."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Gibbs said as McGee looked guilty.

"And popcorn!" Abby added.

"Oooh popcorn!" Tony said, following Abby over to her microwave as McGee began setting the projector up.

"How are you doing, my dear," Ducky said as he went over to where Ziva was sitting on the mattress and knelt in front of her.

"I am okay, Ducky," Ziva answered, wearily, as Ducky pulled a blood pressure cuff out from his medical bag. She extended her arm to Ducky, too tired to fight him this time.

"It's rather high," Ducky said, unimpressed with the reading.

"I assure you that it will be lower when we kill Hadar," Ziva said. "I mean, catch Hadar," she said, catching herself and looking at Gibbs.

"I think you got it right the first time," Gibbs said.

Suddenly the piercing sound of bullets smashing against glass filled the room. Gibbs instinctively reached across and pulled Ziva back on the mattress so that they were both lying flat. From the back of the room he heard Abby scream, frightened, and he heard a groan before the sound of bullets again, this time from inside the room.

"I lost him boss!" McGee shouted after he had fired shots back out of the window, before picking up his cell phone and dialling out.

"This is Special Agent Timothy McGee. We've had a shooting through the window of the forensics lab. There is a gunman on the loose… no I didn't see him or her. Okay, I'm coming up now. Send agents out immediately and alert security. Nobody gets in or out." McGee looked at his projector which had been destroyed by bullets, and groaned before rushing into the elevator.

"Is everyone all right?" Gibbs shouted out as he and Ziva carefully sat up. To his horror, Gibbs saw that Ducky was in the same position that he had been in before the shooting, crouched in front of them. His face had lost its colour.

"Jethro…" Ducky muttered weakly.

"Oh my God," Ziva said, her voice filled with dread. She reached an arm around Ducky's back and felt her hand become wet. She pulled it away and it was covered in blood. Gibbs pulled out his cell phone and dialled 911, informing them of the emergency.

"Tony!" Ziva shouted. "I need some towels. Ducky's been hit!"

Tony and Abby rushed back to where Gibbs, Ziva and Ducky were. Tony was holding a towel.

"It's all there is," Tony said, handing the towel to Ziva who pressed it firmly to Ducky's back to try and contain the bleeding.

"Tony, go with McGee!" Gibbs ordered as the colour continued to drain from Ducky's face. He could no longer sit up by himself and Gibbs and Ziva had to hold on to him. Tony drew his gun and got into the elevator.

"Stay with us, Duck," Gibbs said as Ducky's eyes started to close. Suddenly alarms sounded as the building was officially put on lockdown.

"The towel's soaked through," Ziva said as blood started to drip onto the floor. "Abby, I need something else to control this bleeding." Abby didn't appear to hear Ziva. She looked as pale as Ducky did as she watched on in horror. "Abby!" Ziva shouted at her. Abby finally seemed to hear Ziva and looked around frantically. Finally she picked Bert the plush hippo up from a bench and gave him to Ziva who pressed the toy against Ducky's back. Surprisingly it proved to be more effective than the towel. By now they could hear sirens as the ambulance was getting closer. Gibbs breathed a small sigh of relief as he concentrated on keeping Ducky, who was no longer talking, awake.

Minutes later, two paramedics rushed into the lab and Ziva and Gibbs stepped back to give them room. The paramedics threw Bert the hippo to the side and got to work trying to stabilise Ducky, who was barely conscious.

"He's going to need surgery," one of the paramedics said. "Are any of you going to ride with us?" Gibbs wanted to go to the hospital but knew that given the situation at NCIS, he couldn't.

"I'll be there as soon as I can," he told the paramedics.

"I wouldn't leave it too long," the other paramedic said with a grave look on his face as they lifted Ducky up on a stretcher and took him into the elevator. Gibbs stared at the closed doors for a few seconds and forced himself to focus on the job at hand.

"Right," he said to Ziva and Abby. "I'm taking you two to…" his mind raced trying to think of a safe place. "Autopsy."

"Autopsy?!" Abby cried.

"Yes, autopsy," Gibbs replied. "I need to know that you're safe."

"Gibbs," Ziva spoke up. "I have my gun. I can-"

"- Stay with Abby in autopsy," Gibbs told her. "Come on." Abby picked up blood soaked Bert from the floor and followed Gibbs and Ziva to the stairwell.

"So much for bullet resistant glass," Gibbs said to himself as they climbed the stairs.

"This is the worst slumber party ever," Abby said, her voice trembling.


	14. I Loved You More Than You'll Ever Know

Hey guys, here's another chapter for you. Are you still enjoying this? Let me know.

Hope everyone is well.

**Chapter 14- I Loved You More Than You'll Ever Know**

"Stay here," Gibbs warned Ziva and Abby as he left them in autopsy. "Abby, do you have your phone?" Gibbs asked, remembering that he had smashed his and Ziva's earlier. Abby nodded. "Good," Gibbs said. "Call Dinozzo or McGee if you need anything." Gibbs turned to leave.

"Gibbs," Ziva said solemnly after him.

"Yeah," Gibbs said, turning back around.

"I'm sorry," Ziva said quietly, looking at her feet.

"Did you fire those bullets into Abby's lab?" Ziva shook her head. "Well, then I don't wanna hear it. Stay put." Gibbs closed the door to autopsy, leaving Ziva and Abby alone. Ziva went over to the sinks and washed Ducky's blood from her hands. She turned to Abby who was clutching Bert and standing as still as a statue, leaning against one of the autopsy tables.

"Abby," Ziva said. Abby didn't appear to hear her. "Abby!" Ziva said, louder this time. Abby snapped out of her reverie and looked at Ziva. "Look, you're covered in blood," Ziva said, pointing to the front of Abby's shirt which was stained with Ducky's blood, transferred from Bert. "Why don't you put the toy down?" Ziva tried to take Bert from Abby but Abby resisted. Ziva sighed in resignation and let go. She walked to another autopsy table and sat on it, swinging her legs impatiently and hating that she wasn't allowed to help.

"This feels like Ari all over again," Abby said, close to tears.

"Yes it does," Ziva agreed, sadly.

"Poor Ducky," Abby said, the shock starting to wear off and the panic starting to set in. "Oh my God, what if he dies? Or what if he's paralysed?! Oh my God, oh my God!"

"Abby-" Ziva started, but she stopped herself, remembering that Abby needed to get these things out of her system.

Suddenly the autopsy doors opened and Ziva jumped to her feet, pulled her gun out of her holster and pointed it squarely at the doorway.

"Don't shoot," McGee said as he walked in with his hands in the air. "It's just us." Ziva put her gun back in its holster.

"How's Ducky?" Abby asked, urgently.

"No news," Tony said as he and Gibbs followed McGee inside. "The whole base was searched and they came up with nothing."

"Except a few shells," McGee said, holding an evidence bag. "Can you run them, Abby?" Abby shook her head.

"I'm not going back down there," she said defiantly.

"Abs," Gibbs said, walking over to her. He gently put his hands on her shoulders and began massaging them. "I know you're frightened and I'm sorry that you had to see what you did. But I need you to do this. I don't know how to do your job. If I did, I wouldn't ask you to do this. I will come down to the lab with you and I won't leave until you do, okay?" Abby thought about this for a moment and nodded.

"For Ducky," she said in a small voice.

"Good girl," Gibbs said. "Ziva, you stay with Dinozzo. McGee, let the team in Jordan know about this. They could use this evidence to build their case against Hadar."

"On it, boss," McGee replied as he left with Gibbs and Abby.

"Are you alright?" Tony asked Ziva, walking over to her and standing in front of her. Ziva nodded.

"I am fine. It's Ducky that I am worried about."

"Me too," Tony admitted. "Your hands are shaking," he observed.

"It was almost me," Ziva said. "It should have been me. Ducky was standing in front of me. Gibbs pulled me away and-"

"It's not your fault," Tony said.

"Then why do I feel like it is?" Ziva asked. "If I hadn't brought my problems back to your country than-"

"-than you'd be dead," Tony interrupted her. "And that's not an option in my book." He reached forward and took Ziva's hand in his. She didn't resist. "Come on," he said. "Let's go back to the squad room. I might even give you something to do to save you going out of your mind."

"Thank you," Ziva said, hoping to be of some use. Ziva let Tony lead her by the hand to the elevator.

"You're in pain," Tony said as the ascended to the squad room floor. "I can tell by the way that you're standing."

"I left my medicine in Abby's lab," Ziva admitted.

"I'll get it," Tony said as the elevator doors opened. He walked Ziva over to her desk and McGee, who was on hold on the phone tried not to react when he saw them hand in hand. Ziva sat down at her desk. "Stay here," Tony said. Ziva nodded. "Probie, don't let Ziva out of your sight," Tony said as he went back to the elevator.

Ziva sat at her desk for the first time since she had been back at NCIS. So much had happened since the last time that she had been there that she felt like an entirely different person.

"Ziva?" McGee asked as he watched her staring into space. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Ziva said, nodding and trying to shake off the memories. "Is it safe for me to check my email?" McGee quickly checked that the network's firewall and other protection settings were in order and nodded before somebody on the other end of the line finally became available.

"Yes this is special Agent Timothy McGee from NCIS… no, you called me… yes… She isn't here… No I'm afraid that I can't disclose that information at the present time…"

Ziva wondered who was looking for her but she immediately stopped hearing McGee when she opened her NCIS email account and, among the usual office memos and jokes from Tony she saw an email from Eli David. It was dated at the previous day. Nervously, Ziva clicked on it and waited for it to open. When it opened, it read:

_Ziva,_

_I understand that I have let my position as Director overshadow my duty to you. I realize that I should have flown to Somalia to see you after what you went through. I admit that I was afraid of seeing what they had done to you. Israelis are not cowards and yet I acted as a coward and not as a father who loves his daughter. I need you to know that I behaved as I did because I love you, not because I don't. I understand that you need some time away and I will give you all the time that you need. When you feel that you are ready, I would like to talk, as a father, not as a Director. _

_All my love_

_Papa_

Ziva noticed that the email had an attachment. She clicked on it and waited for it to open. The attachment was the same photograph that she had left on the container ship, and which sat in Eli's office, of Ziva, her brother Ari and her little sister Tali as children. It had been scanned. Ziva felt her eyes well with tears at this unexpected development. At that moment she suddenly wanted to do nothing more than pick up the phone and talk to her father, wanting to continue the progress that he had made through the email but knowing that she would never have that chance. Ziva set the photograph as her computer's desktop background and stared at it. Now Ari, Tali and her father were dead, who did she have left?

Ziva's question was answered as the elevator doors opened and Gibbs, Abby and Tony, who was carrying Ziva's belongings, emerged with grim expressions on their faces.

"Uh… Ziva…" McGee said as he hung up the phone.

"Not now, McGee," Gibbs said they walked to Ziva's desk.

"What?" Ziva asked, her heart starting to pound. "Did you get news about Ducky?"

"No," Gibbs said. "Abby matched the casings found from the shooting."

"To what?" Ziva asked.

"They were .22 Long Rifle bullets," Abby said. "From a .22-caliber Beretta 70."

"Sound familiar?" Gibbs asked. Ziva nodded, her jaw dropping slightly.

"They don't make those weapons anymore," McGee said, confused.

"No," Ziva spoke up. "But they are the most reliable, effective weapons. And still widely used by Mossad. Almost signatory."

"That explains the phone call that I just got…" McGee said.

"What phone call?" Gibbs asked.

"The one I just tried to tell you about," McGee said.

"Who was it?" Gibbs asked impatiently.

"It was from the Israeli embassy. They want Ziva to go there immediately."

"Why?" Tony asked.

"Two of their staff members, ex Mossad, have gone missing with their weapons. They want to know if Ziva knows where they are."

"They want more than that," Gibbs said under his breath.

"You think that Hadar's influence extends to the Israeli embassy?" Tony asked. "You think that they're all in on this?"

"I don't know who I trust," Gibbs said, frustrated.

"Join the cub," Ziva said quietly.

"Club," McGee corrected her.

"All I know is that as long as Ziva is here with us, she's not being doublecrossed so she stays here. I don't care if the Israeli Prime Minister wants to speak to her," Gibbs said. "Do I make myself clear?" Everybody nodded.

Suddenly the phone on Gibbs' desk rang. He went over to answer it.

"Yeah, Gibbs," he said.

"Jethro," Ducky's slightly drugged voice said. "Did you get the bastard?"

**- **_**Thoughts? **_


	15. I Wasn't Naive

Thanks for your patience. I've had a crazy few weeks and haven't been up for writing. But tonight I've done my best to get a new chapter up for you.

Previously:

"_All I know is that as long as Ziva is here with us, she's not being doublecrossed so she stays here. I don't care if the Israeli Prime Minister wants to speak to her," Gibbs said. "Do I make myself clear?" Everybody nodded._

_Suddenly the phone on Gibbs' desk rang. He went over to answer it._

"_Yeah, Gibbs," he said._

"_Jethro," Ducky's slightly drugged voice said. "Did you get the bastard?"_

**CHAPTER 15-**

"Duck," Gibbs said, breathing a sigh of relief. Ducky had lost so much blood in Abby's lab that Gibbs wasn't sure whether he'd make it to the hospital. He hadn't revealed this fear to his colleagues though. If Gibbs panicked, everybody panicked. "We don't have him yet. We will get him though. Of that I am sure."

"That's good," Ducky replied, still obviously drugged. "I'm about to go into surgery. They're just waiting on the… "Ducky's voice trailed off. "I forgot what I was saying. You know, Jethro, this morphine is marvellous stuff. Actually, being here reminds me of a time when-"

"I'm sorry, Doctor Mallard, but you can't use cell phones in here," a nurse spoke up in the background.

"I'd better go then, Duck," Gibbs said. "Stay safe. I'll be there as soon as I can." Gibbs hung up the phone.

"How is he?" Abby asked Gibbs with dread in her voice.

"On a morphine trip," Gibbs replied. "And waiting to go into surgery. He'll be okay, Abs," he added softly.

"So where to from here, boss?" McGee asked.

"Same as before," Gibbs replied. "Now that the staff have gone home for the day, no one gets in or out of this building. I'm putting extra security outside. I'll get the entire corps out there if I have to. Gibbs noticed that Ziva had not set eyes on him since he had spoken to Ducky on the phone. Instead her eyes were fixed on the computer monitor in front of her.

"Ziva?" Gibbs asked, checking that she was paying attention. Ziva turned her attention to Gibbs and the look on her face made Gibbs want to know what she had been reading on the monitor. "Did you hear what I said?" he asked instead.

"Ziva nodded." She looked as though she was about to say something but then stopped herself.

"What is it?" Tony asked, concerned, stepping towards her. He had seen the look as well.

"Nothing," Ziva said, trying her hardest to be convincing.

"Boss?" McGee asked, breaking the tense silence.

"Yeah," Gibbs replied.

"Should I bring the air mattresses up here? Is this where we're spending the night?"

"I guess so, unless you wanna sleep in autopsy."

"No thanks, Boss," Tony said, creeped out.

"Abby, do you wanna help?" McGee asked, trying to distract her. Abby shook her head and stepped closer to Gibbs. She was still shaken up from Ducky's shooting and only felt safe around Gibbs.

Ten minutes later, McGee exited the elevator struggling with six rolled up air mattresses and a pile of blankets from the supply room. He dumped them on the ground, shooting a glare at Tony who hadn't offered to help him before going back down to Abby's lab for the projector. When he arrived back in the squad room, Gibbs was pacing back and forth trying unsuccessfully, yet again, to reach Vance on his phone. Gibbs cursed Vance and slammed the phone down.

"What do you wanna watch?" McGee asked, listing the names of recently released films, being careful to leave out any violent thrillers. They were getting enough of that lately.

"I don't care, Probie," Tony finally said. McGee raised his eyebrows in surprise and realized that Tony was paying more attention to Ziva than to him. Gibbs was trying to reach Vance again and Abby was pacing around the room nervously. McGee chose a comedy and started playing it, hoping that it would ease some of the tension in the room.

"Come on," Tony said to Ziva pointing towards a mattress on the ground. Ziva nodded and turned her monitor off, her father's last words to her ingrained in her memory forever. Tony took a seat on a mattress, leaning against his desk and Ziva sat next to him.

Gibbs sat down only because it meant that Abby would sit down as well. No one laughed during the movie. They weren't even taking in the plot.

When Ziva's injuries once again became too painful to cope with, she took her pain medication and it didn't take long for her to become drowsy. Tony was also yawning, having been awake for over 36 hours. They climbed onto their separate mattresses and Ziva started to doze off almost immediately. Tony reached over and grabbed some blankets, covering Ziva with one and himself with the other. He turned onto his side, facing Ziva and saw that she was sleepily looking at him. He gave her a little smile and reached his hand out to hers, between them. Ziva took it and he gave her hand a soft, supportive squeeze. Before long they were both asleep, their hands interlocked. By the time the movie was over, McGee and Abby were also asleep.

The only one who didn't sleep at all that night was Gibbs.

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Eight hours later, the NCIS team were all awake, sipping coffees when Gibbs' desk phone rang.

"Yeah, Gibbs."

"Special Agent Gibbs," Vance said.

"Where the hell have you been all night?" Gibbs argued, angrily. He didn't care that he was talking to the Director of NCIS. "One of my team has been shot in this building, there are possible rogue Israelis running around Washington after my team and, let me guess, you were busy chowing down on a rubber chicken dinner at the Whitehouse. Or was it the Capitol this time?"

"Are you finished?" Vance asked Gibbs.

"Not even close," Gibbs replied.

"That being said," Vance said. "I'm standing outside the building with Amit Hadar."

"What?" Gibbs asked in disbelief.

"You heard me," Vance said.

"How did he even get into the country?" Gibbs asked sceptically.

"While you were sleeping. He had time," Vance answered. "As for how he got here undetected, we have an unspoken don't ask, don't tell policy with the Mossad."

"Why is he here?" Gibbs asked. "Because if you if bring him anywhere near me I'll kick his ass all the way back to Israel."

"It seems that your team in Jordan have uncovered quite a bit on Eli David's death implicating Hadar. He got out of Israel before news broke."

"Why here?" Gibbs asked impatiently. "If he's behind Ducky's shooting and the attempt on Ziva's life here he'll end up in jail. Why not escape to another country?"

"The Mossad will find him there, they'll find him wherever he goes," Vance explained. "He's not wanted for murder in the US. Sure he'll spend years in jail but he's not in line for the death penalty here. And in jail he's protected."

"Bastard," Gibbs muttered under his breath.

"I'm bringing him up," Vance said. "I don't want him anywhere near Ziva."

"Neither do I," Gibbs said.

"And Gibbs," Vance added. "I've been to see Doctor Mallard. He's stable and having a wonderful time on the morphine. There should be no permanent damage."

"Thanks," Gibbs said reluctantly, hanging up the phone.

"Ducky's going to be fine," Gibbs told his team. "Abby, Ziva, why don't you hit the showers first?" he suggested.

"He's here isn't he?" Ziva said, trying to keep her voice level. Gibbs nodded.

"He's outside," he said softly. "On his way up with Vance." Ziva took a panicked breath. The man responsible for her capture and everything that she'd been through, the man responsible for the death of her father wasn't on another continent anymore. He was within striking distance. Gibbs walked over to where Ziva was sitting and knelt down in front of her.

"He's not going to be anywhere near you, I promise," Gibbs said.

"He _is_ near me!" Ziva almost shouted, feeling more vulnerable than she had ever felt before in her life.

"You won't see him," Gibbs promised. "Go for a shower and then we'll go from there."

"I'm taking my gun," Ziva said, determined.

"That's fine," Gibbs said, helping her to her feet. Abby linked arms with Ziva and led her to the showers. Several minutes later the elevator doors opened and Gibbs, Tony and McGee braced themselves. They were confronted with Jimmy Palmer.

"Hey," Palmer said. "I noticed that autopsy was empty and I was just wondering if you guys know where Doctor Mallard is. He's usually here by now." He paused for a moment. "Why are there mattresses on the floor?"

"No body does tell you anything do they?" McGee asked Palmer, who looked confused, sympathetically. "Come with me."

Moments later the elevator doors opened. This time, Gibbs and Tony were confronted with Director Vance and Amit Hadar.

After telling himself that he would control himself, as soon as he saw Hadar's face Tony couldn't help himself. He stepped forward and swung his arm as hard as he could, hitting Hadar squarely in the nose. Hadar yelled out in pain and Tony reeled back, feeling as though he'd punched a brick wall.

"Special Agent Dinozzo," Vance said, angrily.

"Sorry Director, I guess he just has that effect on me," Tony replied. Gibbs tried his hardest to hide a proud smile.

"Lose the attitude," Vance warned, tightening his grip on Hadar and leading him to interrogation.


	16. Where You Wanted To Be

_Author's Note: Hey there. Thanks for being patient in between updates. This is the final chapter of this fic. It's been my first NCIS fic so once again I want to thank everyone who reviewed for me. It was really encouraging to read your feedback. I've started a NCIS/Bones crossover fic titled 'The Navy in the Woods' which you can find at my profile if you want to read more from me. I'd love it if you could review this final chapter for me. Thanks again!_

**CHAPTER 16- Where you Wanted to Be**

Inside the interrogation room, Vance paced back and forth, not saying a word, while Amit Hadar sat at the table, his face still bleeding from Tony's punch.

"Are you going to ask me a question?" he asked Vance irritably.

"Got somewhere to be?" Vance replied. From behind the glass Tony stood watching, liking the tough approach that Vance was taking. The door opened and Gibbs entered the room. He handed Tony an icepack for his swollen hand and watched Vance continue to pace around the room.

"I thought you'd be doing this interrogation, boss," Tony said.

"Vance probably wants that bastard alive by the end of it," Gibbs said quietly. Gibbs and Tony turned as they heard the door open and Ziva stepped in, with Abby behind her.

"I tried to keep her away, Gibbs, but she wouldn't listen-" Abby started frantically. Gibbs held up his hand to assure her that it was okay. "I don't wanna go back to the lab yet," Abby said anxiously, images of Ducky being shot still too fresh in her mind.

"Its okay, Abs. Go wait with McGee in the bullpen," Gibbs said. Abby bit her lip and nodded, leaving Ziva with Gibbs and Tony.

"I don't think this is a good idea, Ziva," Tony spoke up. "You don't need to see this guy again." But it was too late. Ziva's eyes were already firmly locked on Hadar.

"Ziva-" Gibbs started, but Ziva held up her hand to stop him as Vance began to speak.

"You've created quite a diplomatic problem for your country and for mine, Hadar," Vance started. "America and Israel are allies and, yes times have been tough recently, but we're always on the same side. What neither Israel nor America will tolerate is a traitor. And that is what you became." Hadar kept his eyes focussed downward.

"I admitted to being behind the attack on NCIS," he said with quiet arrogance. "I will serve my time."

Suddenly Vance slammed his hands on the hard interrogation table.

"I did not give you permission to speak," he said, seething with anger.

"Nice move, Director," Tony said from behind the glass. Gibbs stood behind Ziva and gently placed his hands on her shoulders as she watched the man responsible for the pain inflicted on her over the past few weeks being interrogated. Vance spoke again.

"You are responsible for kidnapping and trying to turn a beloved member of our NCIS team against us and against our country, and yours. You subjected her to torture. You let evil minded men loose on her and all so you could go on some sick power trip? You disgust me." Hadar looked as though he was going to speak, but refrained. "And then when she made it out alive, you had her father, the Director of Mossad, murdered. You threw an international intelligence agency into turmoil risking Israel's national security. And then you came after her again." Vance shook his head at Hadar, disgusted. "You are a liar, a traitor, a murderer. As I said, Israel has a strong relationship with this country. And we want to make that relationship stronger." Vance pulled a folded up piece of paper and a pen out of his suit pocket. He signed the document.

"This is your extradition order. I've granted the request of the Israeli government to have you sent back to face charges of murder, treason, kidnapping… the list goes on. As I'm sure you know, these crimes all carry the death penalty."

"No!" Hadar exclaimed angrily. "That is not what we agreed upon."

"I don't make agreements with the likes of you," Vance said, folding the piece of paper up and placing it back in his pocket. He nodded towards the window where Gibbs, Tony and Ziva were standing. Gibbs opened the door and spoke to two people waiting outside. The door to the interrogation room opened and two men entered.

"Hadar, meet Adam and Ezra. They work for the Israeli embassy and are former Officers of the Mossad. They'll be escorting you home now. I'm sure you'll have a lot to talk about."

"You cannot do this!" Hadar protested. The two strongly built Israeli men forced Hadar to his feet violently and marched him out the door. Gibbs left the room and met Vance outside.

"Nice work, Director," Gibbs said, extending his hand to Vance who shook it. The two men followed Hadar and the other Israeli men until they left the building, Hadar protesting all the way.

Ziva continued to stare through the glass at the empty interrogation room, a silent tear falling down her cheek.

"Hey," Tony said, softly as he noticed how upset she was. "We got him, Ziva. He's gonna pay for what he's done." Ziva nodded, taking a deep breath and wiping the tear from her face.

"I know," she said quietly. "I just can't believe that I was betrayed like that. I trusted him. I trusted Michael. I trusted Ari. And now my father is dead too. I don't know who I can trust anymore."

"Us," Tony said with conviction, taking Ziva's hand. "Gibbs, me, McGee, Abby, Ducky. We're a team. We've always been a team and that bastard can't take that away from you. Don't let what he put you through affect your trust in us."

"It hasn't," Ziva said, truthfully. "NCIS is all I have now." Ziva lifted her head and looked at Tony. "What happens now?"

"Vance will probably make you go through therapy," Tony said. Ziva shook her head, displaying her trademark stubbornness.

"No," she said defiantly. "I don't want to talk about it anymore. I can't keep reliving-" before she could finish the sentence she dissolved into tears, the memories catching up with her. Tony pulled her into his arms and held her tightly, kissing the top of her head.

"You'll keep reliving it until you get the tools to cope with it," Tony said, thinking back to the counselling that he had received after Jeanne had left, although he couldn't compare what he went through to what Ziva had been through. Ziva was angry at herself for crying but she couldn't help but feel comforted by Tony's warm embrace. He had stood by her through everything. She closed her eyes and let him hold her, the sadness overwhelming her now that some of the anger had dissipated with Hadar's capture and extradition. When she felt strong enough, Ziva took a deep breath and lifted her head from Tony's chest. She looked damaged but determined not to let Hadar maintain any control over her life. Tony tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear and leaned forward, whispering in her ear.

"Let's go home."

"Hey guys," McGee said as Tony and Ziva walked through the bullpen, arms linked. McGee and Abby were sitting by McGee's computer. "Vance has sent us all home for the day. Ducky's improving and they've arrested the two guys behind shooting him."

"Good to hear McNewsreel," Tony said. "See ya tomorrow."

McGee and Abby watched Tony and Ziva leave, looking very close.

"Are they….?" Abby asked.

"Nope," Gibbs said as he returned to the bullpen. "But give them time. I think they just might."

**The end. **


End file.
